The Reluctant Prom Date
by Melanie Brown
Copyright © 2004
Part 1
Bleary-eyed, I peeked at the alarm clock. Six thirty-five in
the A.M. I hadn’t been awake before seven
thirty on a Christmas morning in years.
A pale shaft of moon light pierced through the curtains. I slowly pulled
myself out of bed and took a look outside. The east was just starting to take
on the glow of dawn. A coat of frost glistened on the lawn. All the snow
we’ve had this month, and none of it falls on Christmas day.
I shook my head to get my hair to settle down. In the
soft dawn and moon light, I looked at myself in the mirror. I was wearing the
Christmas nightgown Diane had gotten me. My hair cascaded over my shoulders
and down almost to the middle of my back. My first Christmas as a girl. I
thought back over the roller-coaster ride that was the past few months. I
picked up Jeff’s picture from my dresser and wondered, how the hell did I get
here?
Looking at Jeff’s picture brought a longing and a
loneliness to my heart. I smiled as I ran my finger down the image of Jeff’s
face. I’m totally in love with a boy. I would’ve called you nuts if you told
me a few months ago that I’d be so crazy for a boy that I almost couldn’t think
of anything else.
There was no point in trying to go back to sleep. I
quietly opened my bedroom door and padded in my sock feet down the hall to the
living room. I could see the soft glow of the Christmas tree lights as soon as
I entered the hallway. I thought Dad must have forgotten to unplug the tree
again.
As I entered the living room, I was surprised to see
Diane sitting on the couch staring at the Christmas tree. She was wearing her
Christmas nightgown as well. When she saw me come in, Diane gave me a big
smile and whispered, “Merry Christmas!” and motioned for me to sit next to her.
As I sat down, she gave me a big hug and we kissed
each other on the cheek. She took my hand and looked back at the tree.
Without looking back at me, she said, “You know, this is my first Christmas
back at home in five years. What was I thinking? I wasn’t that far away.” she
sighed. “I was so grown up, so independent. I didn’t need Mom or Dad or
family traditions.”
“We certainly missed you” I said. Well, Mom and Dad
did anyway. “Mom never said anything, but I could tell it bothered her each
time when you said you weren’t coming home.” It was true enough, but it’s fun
to twist the guilt knife when you get the chance.
Diane turned back to me with tears welling up in her
eyes. Sobbing slightly, she said, “I cried every Christmas morning and then
I’d lie to myself about how I was too grown up to bother with silly things like
coming home for a holiday. I had my own life, right? My own friends to hang
with.” She looked back to the tree and said, “But all my friends went home for
the holidays…” Her voice trailed away.
I suddenly felt ashamed for trying to add to Diane’s
guilt. I gave her a big hug and said softly, “It’s OK Diane. We’re all here
now for at least one more Christmas.” We then hugged and cried together for a
minute or two.
We were sitting quietly, holding hands and staring at
the tree when Mom dragged herself into the living room, desperately needing her
morning cup of coffee. She looked at us in surprise and said, “Hey…Merry
Christmas. I haven’t seen you two up so early for Christmas morning since you
were both little gir…er, boy…ah, both little.” She then shuffled off to the
kitchen.
We were both watching Mom when a voice vaguely
resembling my Dad called from the hallway, “Hey, kittens. Look over here.”
The moment we looked in that direction, we were instantly blinded by the flash
of Dad’s camera. Dad chuckled as he entered the living room and said, “Let me
get some coffee and let’s get this show on the road.”
It was a Christmas morning like we hadn’t had in our
house for many years. All of us together and up early to open presents. It
made me feel like a kid again. And the new level of my relationship with Diane
made it extra special. This morning was also very different from past
Christmases. I didn’t get one single computer game or console game. Not one!
Being a girl really changes the kind of presents you get. Just as a quick
example, Mom got me some new panties and a skirt. Diane got me some really
cute earrings, make-up, some hair clips, and a Barbie doll. She said every
girl should have at least one. Dad gave me some music CD’s.
Diane was handing out the presents and she saved all
of Jeff’s presents for last. I looked at the brightly wrapped presents in
front of me for a moment. Presents from my boyfriend. I wished Jeff could be
here to watch me open them. I opened them slowly.
One package contained more earrings. At first I
thought they were real diamonds, even though I didn’t think Jeff could afford
them. Then I saw the “CZ” label. They were still very pretty and I couldn’t
wait to wear them. The second package contained a pretty sweater. The final
package was small and contained a necklace with a heart shaped pendant engraved
with “Chrissy & Jeff”. I started to cry when I saw it and with Diane’s
help, clasped it around my neck right then.
Dad let out a belch.
Groaning a little while standing, Dad surveyed the
torn wrapping paper all over the floor and muttered, “Another Christmas shot to
hell.” He scratched himself and walked off towards the kitchen.
Diane picked up Jeff’s earrings. “These look nice.
Let’s see how they look on you.”
A few moments later, I had the studs in my ears and
Diane and I raced to the bathroom to look in the mirror. I turned my head this
way and that, watching the light sparkle.
“Very pretty!” Diane said. “You’re so lucky. He
loves you, Chrissy. I think he really does love you.”
I just giggled and smiled at her as I felt tears
welling up again. I wished Jeff was here so I could show him how much I liked
his gifts.
We heard a pan rattling from the kitchen. Diane
suddenly looked up and said, “Mom’s making breakfast. I haven’t helped her
make Christmas breakfast in years!” She disappeared from the bathroom.
Christmas breakfast was another tradition in our house. Every year we had
scrambled eggs, sausage and muffins. The menu never varied and none of us ever
minded.
I stood there in front of the mirror for a few more
moments looking at my earrings and necklace when it dawned on me that Diane had
left. “Hey!” I squealed as I bolted out of the bathroom. “I want to help too”
Diane and I bounded into the kitchen within seconds of
each other. Mom looked up from the refrigerator with a surprised look and
said, “Oh, my! Two helpers! I don’t know if I can take that or not.”
Diane playfully pushed me back saying, “Get lost,
squirt. We need real cooks in here.”
“Hey! I know how to cook!” I protested.
Mom nodded in my direction while looking at Diane and
said, “That’s right. She’s a very good cook.” Mom handed me a muffin pan and
said, “You can make the muffins, and you…” Mom handed an egg carton to Diane,
“can make the scrambled eggs.”
Mom stood back with a satisfied expression as we
started on our assigned duties. “I can get used to this!”
Dad was already at the table, ready to eat when Diane
set down the platter with the food piled high. He was already digging in as I
set out the glasses of orange juice.
As I sat down, Diane said, “This looks really good. I
can’t tell you guys how much I missed this.” Mentally I begged her not to
start another crying fest.
Between mouthfuls, Dad said, “Yep, it’s great to have
the whole family together again. It’s just like old times.” Dad glanced over
at me and as he looked back into his plate for another bite, he muttered,
“Well, almost.”
Mom reached across the table and took Diane’s and my
hand, squeezed them and said, “I feel truly blessed to have such two wonderful
daughters!”
Diane smiled and said, “It helps to have two really
great parents!”
I felt I had reached sugar overload and would explode
if this mutual admiration society didn’t stop. So I said, “I’m thinking about
keeping my job at the theater. Gwen can use the help, Diane, so why don’t you
ask her for a job too?”
Wrinkling her brow at the sudden topic change, Diane
let out a short laugh and said, “You’re not serious are you? In a month or two
after I start mass-mailing out my resume’, some big company is bound to jump at
the chance to hire me for some high-paying position. I don’t have time for a
teen’s job at a theater. I need to spend my time practicing my job interview
skills.”
It was Dad’s turn to belch a short laugh. “Diane, I
hope you don’t think it’s that quick or easy. It could take months, maybe quite
a few months, to land a job. And it won’t be at the top.”
Mom frowned at Dad and said, “Dear, don’t try to
discourage her. Diane’s a very capable young woman.”
Diane looked smug as she said, “Enjoy this Dad. This
could be the last time all of us are together for Christmas. I might be at
some high-paying job in California, basking in the sun this time next year. And who
knows? Jeff and Chrissy might be married and starting a family.”
Dad coughed some scrambled eggs out his nose. He
looked over at me, eye twitching.
“Diane, don’t be goofy.” I said. “Jeff and I can’t
get married and we certainly wouldn’t be starting a family.” Hmmm…Mrs.
Kowalski…Christine Kowalski…Mrs. Jeff Kowalski…
“You can always adopt.” Diane said. “Don’t you want
to be a mommy?” She giggled.
Before I could answer, the phone rang. Mom got up
saying, “Now who could that be?” She picked up the phone and spoke a minute
before handing the phone to me. “It’s for you, dear.”
I took the phone and said, “Hello?”
“Hey babe! It’s me! Merry Christmas!” said Jeff
through the phone.
“Jeff! Hi honey! It’s so great to hear from you!” I
squealed. I saw Diane roll her eyes.
“It’s great to hear you too, babe. Have you opened
your presents yet? I’m not sure what time it is there.”
Diane started making kissy faces, so I turned towards
the wall and said, “Yes, I did! And thank you so much for presents! The
sweater is great and I really love the earrings and necklace. I’m wearing them
now. Have you opened yours yet?”
I could hear some other voices through the phone as
Jeff answered, “No, not yet. We all just got up here. It’s kind of a zoo.”
“Are you having a family reunion or something?” I
asked.
“Yeah, something like that.” In the background I
heard a girl’s voice ask him who he was talking to. Though muffled, I heard
him say, “It’s just a girl back home. I’ll be through in a minute.”
My words starting to ice up, I said, “Oh, now I’m just
A girl. Not THE girl, huh?”
He didn’t try to muffle the pickup on the phone, but
his head was turned away as he said, “Sorry, I should say it’s my girlfriend
back home.” To me he said, “Sorry. I wasn’t trying to imply that you were
special to me.”
Acid dripping from my words I asked, “Just curious
Jeff, who was that girl you were talking to?”
He paused a moment before saying, “That was just
Lana. She’s…she’s my ah, cousin… She’s been showing me the sights here in Tuscon.
They’ve got an old military aircraft graveyard museum and an old west movie lot
here.”
I regretted it almost as soon as I said, “Lana, huh? Well,
I hope she’s not showing everything there is to see in Tuscon.”
Sounding annoyed, Jeff said, “Babe, she’s just my
cousin. Sheesh! It sounds like you don’t trust me!”
Right then, I didn’t trust him any further than I
could throw him, but I said, “Oh no, Jeffy. I trust you. I just miss you, that’s
all.”
“I’ll be home soon. Listen, babe. I gotta go. Have
a merry Christmas and I’ll see you soon.”
I disconnected the phone and started balling my eyes
out.
* * *
“Can you believe that guy?” I asked as Diane and I
walked along the sidewalk. Even though it was still pretty cold, it was sunny
and we had decided to go for a walk around the block.
Diane smirked, “Sis, there’s nothing that guys do that
surprises me anymore. But you know, maybe he was telling you the truth. Maybe
this Lana person really is his cousin.”
I let out a short laugh and said, “Yeah, like Phil’s
cousin?”
Diane winced, but said, “Jeff isn’t Phil. Not every
guy is a jerk. I guess. Besides, you two have a much deeper relationship than
any I ever had. Mine were always mostly about sex.”
I paused a moment, then asked, “Should we be having
sex?”
Diane stopped walking and turned to me. “There’s no
law that says you have to. But most relationships lead to that eventually.”
I shuddered. “But I don’t know if I want to have sex
with a guy!”
Diane smiled and said, “Technically sis, you already
have…with Eddie.”
I shuddered again and started walking. “But I felt
so…so ashamed afterward.”
“Did you enjoy it at the time?” Diane asked. I didn’t
answer as we continued to walk. “Did you enjoy it?”
I stopped walking and turned to Diane. In a small
voice I said simply, “Yes”
Diane studied me for a moment before putting her arms
around me for a hug. “Listen sis. You and Jeff are in love. Guys can’t stop
being guys. You have to trust them until they give you a good reason not to.”
She started walking again.
Diane continued, “You two have a relationship that I
could only dream about. I’ve been nuts over lots of guys, but I’ve never had a
love as deep as the one you have. Don’t worry about sex. If you get to that
stage…well, I think it would only make your bond with Jeff even tighter.”
“And if it doesn’t?” I asked.
Diane shrugged. “Trust your heart. You think too
much.”
* * *
I was sitting on the couch listening to one of my new
CD with my portable player, when the phone rang. I saw Mom answer it. A
moment later she hands me the phone and needlessly says, “It’s for you.” As I
take off my headphones, she looks quizzically at me and added quietly, “It’s
some boy.”
“Hello?” I asked into the phone.
“Chrissy! Merry Christmas!” said the voice on the
other end. There was a pause before he said, “It’s me, Danny.”
“Oh, hi Danny. And a Merry Christmas to you. Did you
have a good Christmas?” I asked.
“Yeah, sorta. Mom and Dad actually were in town this
time.” He paused a moment then said, “Can I ask you something?”
Now what? With dread in my voice, I asked, “Like
what?”
He paused a few moments, then said, “Wednesday, would
you take me on a date? With me dressed as a girl and you pretending to be a
guy? Please? I just want to know what it’s like to be on a date as a girl.
I’ll give you the money to pay for it.”
I asked myself, does Danny even know what it’s like to
go on a date as a guy yet? To Danny I said, “Gee, Danny. I don’t know…”
Excitedly, Danny said, “I’ve been working on my
make-up, like you showed me. I bought a new wig that looks just like real
hair!”
“Gee Danny, I don’t know…”
“Oh come on. It’ll be fun!” exclaimed Danny. “Since
in reality I’ll still be a guy and you’ll still be a girl, it’ll still be OK.
What else do you have to do?
I had a sudden vision of Jeff, walking hand-in-hand
with that Lana chick. Hmmm…what else do I have to do?
* * *
End of Part 1
since 01/18/05