G11 - Colony

By Sarah Bayen
Edited by Deborah Williams
G113-sm.jpg - 55976 Bytes

Cover Art by Daphne Teal

( This is the full edited verison that is published by Sapphire's Place Press - and is the full text of the paper book! )

 

Chapter One

Steve winced as he made his way to the door of his room. He held a hand against his stomach and felt the baby kicking. God, she was getting lively these days, constantly poking out an arm or a leg into the ever-expanding wall of his stomach. He stroked himself absently, urging the baby to settle. He hoped she wouldn’t be quite so lively when it was born, otherwise he’d never get any sleep.

He pressed the panel, and went out into the Common Area. It was empty, partly because it was the middle of the day, but equally because so many of his companions were down on the Planet’s surface. He steadied himself, and began an undignified waddle towards the Archway. He had been in his room all morning, and wanted a change of scenery.

He felt so big, even with nearly 80 days to go, and dreaded getting even bigger. Poor Charles was even further gone, and seemed to find it difficult to move at all. Still, at least he wasn’t having any problems with sickness any more. Jacquie had had that virtually all the way through, in spite of the medication the Machine offered them. He wondered whether that was because she was even more upset and surprised than he had been to suddenly fall pregnant. Pregnant and virgins, they had complained together in the beginning. Maybe confounding nature like that made things worse.

He walked along the corridors slowly, and muttered to himself about the ridiculous size of his boobs. He had been quite proud of them once, when they had first grown. Vain, he knew, but he had liked the way the boys used to look at him. They still looked, of course, but more in horror and pity now, or so he assumed.

Karen told him he was still beautiful; still as pretty as he had ever been. He didn’t really believe her. How could anyone find him pretty, when he looked more like one of the Leviathan fish they had found down in the Planet’s seas? Huge and bloated creatures, Sarah had shown him images of them on one of her rare visits back to the ship. He missed her. He could do with the company of one of his sisters, as he liked to think of Sarah and Jeanette.

And pregnancy was so undignified! He had to wee about once every thirty minutes, even during the night, as the baby pressed mercilessly down on his bladder. What with that and the damn tests the Machine insisted on every week or so, prodding and probing his ever- extending diaphragm, he hardly had any dignity left!

Not that he blamed the baby, that little thing growing inside him and making so many demands on his body. He secretly spoke to her, telling her all the things she would see when she was born, and how he would make sure no harm ever came to her. No, he didn’t blame the baby; he loved her. He blamed something else however; the Machine, for getting him pregnant without asking his permission. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t had enough emotional traumas to deal with, what with losing his parents and then becoming a girl! Apparently it had chosen him because it concluded that he had one of the least physical tasks to do in establishing the colony, and was ideal breeding material. And what’s more it had chosen Eddie to be the father! God, if it had to get him pregnant, it could have at least chosen Karen!

He blamed the boys as well, all of them! They strutted around the ship, laughed together, and stared at him. They still played football and were sent off down to the Planet, something his condition apparently rendered beyond him. They all seemed so much taller than when he was one of them too; taller and broader, and totally intolerable. They seemed to revel in their lack of pregnancy, their lack of ability to get pregnant, and he hated them for it. He petulantly wished that one or two of them could spend a day or so pregnant, just so they would see what it was like.

He even at times blamed Karen. He regretted it when he did, but he was occasionally cross with her for no reason, shouting at her, or pushing her away when she tried to put an arm around his shoulders. There were times when he just didn’t want to be touched, she should understand that! Still, she was hardly ever on the ship these days. Thanks to Stuart’s skills, they could still communicate through his Interface, and he found her daily calls to him one of the better parts of his life.

He reached the Refectory, and walked in. Eddie and Nigel were sitting at one of the tables, and turned to look at him as he entered. Steve saw their faces, and read all sorts of emotions into them. Eddie stood, and offered Steve a seat, which he gratefully took.

“What would you like?” he asked, standing next to the mountain that was now Steve.

“Just a drink. Fruit juice,” Steve replied, rubbing his stomach once more. Eddie had been really sweet about all this. Steve had wondered whether to tell him that he was the father. It was bound to be a shock for him, especially as his relationship with Malcolm was more or less in the open now. Eddie had been surprised, naturally enough. But he had taken it well. He had even offered to marry Steve for God’s sake! How sweet was that? Steve had refused, of course, but Eddie had been especially solicitous since then.

“So how are things going?” Nigel asked nervously. Steve looked at him, tall and dark, sitting in the chair next to him. He was visibly backing away, as if Steve’s pregnancy was some dark disease, possibly even contagious.

“I’m fine,” Steve assured him. “I just get a bit tired.”

“I can imagine,” Nigel agreed, taking a huge bite out of a synthetic meat sandwich he held in his large hands. “Still, it suits you.”

“Suits me?” Steve echoed incredulously. Nigel nodded, his mouth still full. Eddie returned with a small glass of fruit juice, which he placed on the table in front of Steve before sitting back down.

Steve turned to look at the father of his child. “Nigel was just telling me how being pregnant suited me,” he said petulantly.

“Err, yeah,” Eddie stuttered. “Well, you do look good with it, better than Charles or Jacquie.”

“Yeah,” Nigel agreed. “Jacquie looks really pale at the moment.”

Steve turned from one to the other. God, they were so bloody insensitive. And he hated the way they looked at him; the pity, the horror and the dread. “Well I haven’t got much choice have I?” he said bitterly. “And the worst thing about it is the way people look at me.”

“What do you mean?” Eddie asked.

Steve glared at him. “Oh you know, that sort of pitying look. Pity mixed in with contempt.” He glared at the two boys, daring them to contradict him.

“I don’t think anyone feels like that,” Nigel suggested at last, looking nervously at Eddie. “In fact I’m sure they don’t.”

“Well you do for a start!” Steve accused him as the baby kicked again, making him suck in his breath.

“I don’t!” Nigel exclaimed. “No way!”

“No,” Eddie agreed. “You’re imagining it Steve.”

“So apart from making me fat, being pregnant has made me imagine things has it?” Steve snapped, turning away from the other two with a theatrical flourish. They were silent for a few moments before Nigel spoke again.

“I think you’re mistaking why people look at you,” he said, quietly. “To be honest Steve, I think what most people feel when they look at you is a sort of awe.”

“Yeah,” Eddie agreed.

Steve turned back to them. That particular emotion had never occurred to him. “Awe?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Nigel went on. “I certainly do. It’s,” he hesitated. “It’s amazing really, knowing that you’ve got a baby in there, a whole little person. Especially now we’ve decided to settle on this planet. It’s like, I don’t know, it’s like the future.”

“Yeah,” Eddie agreed. Then he added pointedly. “My future as well.”

Steve looked at the two of them, and suddenly realized how wrong he might have been in interpreting people’s reactions to him. The way the boys moved out of his way when he came down the corridor. Maybe they really were in awe of him, or rather his pregnancy, not horrified that someone who had so recently been a boy too could be in such a condition.

He suddenly felt very sad, and tears formed in his eyes. That was another thing he hated about being pregnant. When he had first become a girl, he had been subject to all sorts of emotional outbursts, but he had managed to get them under control. Pregnancy had eroded that ability however, and he found himself awash on a sea of mood swings.

“There, don’t worry about it,” Eddie said, finding a napkin from somewhere and dabbing at Steve’s cheeks with it. Steve pushed his hand away ungratefully.

“I’m all right,” he insisted, and took a sip from his fruit juice. God, it tasted odd! Everything tasted odd these days.

“I’m off down to the surface in a couple of days,” Eddie told him conversationally. Steve looked at him, and felt a pang of jealousy. Everybody seemed to get down to the surface these days; everybody except him, Charles and Jacquie that is.

“That’s nice,” he replied, sipping at his drink once more.

“It’ll be good to see Malcolm again,” the boy added sheepishly. Steve glanced at Nigel, to judge his reaction. He didn’t seem particularly phased by the comment.

“I’m sure it will be,” Steve responded. “I expect he’s missing you. Does he call you?”

Eddie shook his head. “No, he’s a bit embarrassed I think.”

Steve nodded. Much as Eddie and Malcolm’s relationship was public knowledge, they still seemed to feel a need to maintain propriety when dealing with each other. Public displays of affection between them were very limited, which Steve thought was a shame. The baby kicked again, and he pulled a face.

“Are you all right?” Eddie asked him. He nodded once more.

“It’s your bloody child practicing its football,” he said, and Eddie gave a rare smile.

“Is it a boy then?” Nigel asked, looking up from his food. “I didn’t know that.”

“Nor do I,” Steve told him. He had asked the Machine, who told him his baby was a girl, or genetically female in its parlance, but he had kept that small secret to himself.

“That’s a bit old fashioned,” Nigel observed.

Steve looked at him. He was right of course. It was a rather sentimental piece of nonsense, refusing to let people know the poor baby’s gender. He shrugged. “Well maybe I’m old fashioned,” he replied. “But all I wanted to know was that baby was all right. I don’t care whether it’s got a Willy or not.”

This comment seemed to embarrass the two boys, although Steve could not entirely fathom why. There was an awkward silence for a moment, before Charles walked to join them in the Refectory. Steve smiled at him in empathy, as he waddled from the door to the table, even larger and more awkward than Steve. He was nearly due, and that was evident from his shape and his demeanour, now almost always dreamy and half asleep.

“Hello darling!” Steve greeted him enthusiastically. The three pregnant friends had formed something of a support group over the past few months. It had been good in a way to be able to have the benefit of Charles’ prior experiences, always a month or two ahead of both Steve and Jacquie, as they progressed through their latest journey, their trip towards motherhood.

Charles plomped into a chair that Eddie had quickly provided for him. He took a few seconds to catch his breath. “Is everything all right?” Steve asked.

Charles nodded. Steve looked at him in concern. He didn’t look as if he was all right. His bosom, expanded now by both his new femininity and his impending birthing, strained against his top. Steve’s own boobs often felt hot, enlarged and full these days, so he knew what Charles must be going through. “Any news from Sylvia?”

Charles looked sorrowful, and shook his head. Charles felt that Sylvia had virtually ignored him since his pregnancy had become apparent. Charles maintained it was because she was afraid to hurt him, or the new baby in any way, but Steve wasn’t so sure. She had danced very enthusiastically at the event they had held to celebrate the decision to settle on Planet, with more than one girl too. “I expect she’s busy,” Charles hissed, and rubbed his stomach.

Steve watched this with some concern. Charles had had a couple of little contractions over the past few days, and with his date so close, he might begin his labour at any time. “Oh I felt that!” he exclaimed.

“Shall I get you a drink?” Steve asked him.

“I’ll get it!” Eddie insisted, standing. Steve smiled at him. He was becoming the perfect gentleman. “What do you want, Charles?”

“I’m all right,” Charles told him, smiling gratefully for the gesture. “I just need a bit of a rest.”

Eddie frowned, but Steve nodded to reassure him. He looked to Nigel. “I guess we ought to be getting back to work.”

“Yeah,” Nigel agreed. “Oh by the way Steve, we missed you at the Constitutional Committee last night.”

Steve pulled a face. He had meant to go; he knew it was important. Even more so he didn’t want to let Linda down, especially when arranging meetings were so difficult with so many people down on the surface. After the evening meal, however, he had collapsed onto his bed and dozed passed the scheduled time for the meeting.

“We got through a fair bit of work,” Nigel went on, hoping it would engage Steve’s enthusiasm.

“Good,” Steve replied.

The boy was silent for a bit. “We could really use your help at the next meeting,” he ventured. “The more the merrier.”

“But it’s difficult,” Steve muttered shyly. He stared at Charles for support, but he had his eyes closed, and his hand on his stomach. “To be honest Nigel, I fell asleep.”

The boy looked sheepish. “Right,” he said at last, “I suppose it must be a bit tiring.”

“Well perhaps we’d best just leave you two to have a bit of a rest,” Eddie put in solicitously, placing an arm on Steve’s shoulder. Steve smiled; Eddie really could be very sweet. “I want to try out some ideas I’ve had for classifying the life on the planet,” he went on. Steve stared up at him. He had become quite an expert on the animal life of the planet, something he had never shown an aptitude for before. Sarah had been a little put out about it at first, but had confessed to Steve on her last visit to the ship that he was a real boon to her work on the biology of Planet. Steve smiled, and patted Eddie’s hand. “You’ll call me if you need anything?” he asked. Steve nodded again, and Nigel and Eddie left the Refectory, leaving Steve and Charles on their own.

Charles opened his eyes wearily. “He’s really sweet. Eddie, that is,” he muttered. Steve looked over to the door through which the two boys had passed, and thought about this.

“I guess he feels guilty that I’m carrying his baby.”

Charles looked at him. “Well it’s hardly his fault.”

“I know that. But he probably still feels responsible. You know what they’re like, when they’re on a guilt trip.”

Charles smiled ruefully. He and Steve had easily slipped into talking about boys as ‘they’ since they had fallen pregnant. It seemed so proper, and in any case, made conversations with Jacquie and the other girls much less complicated. Charles closed his eyes again, and winced.

“Are you all right?” Steve asked.

“Oh, that one hurt!” Charles confessed.

Steve looked hard into his face, and then down at the floor. “Oh my God Charles, your waters have broken!” Charles looked down at the liquid seeping onto the floor, and a look of horror and fear came across his face. He grabbed at Steve’s arm. “We’d best get you to the Medical Centre.” Steve said with some urgency in his voice.

Steve helped Charles to his feet, and with some difficulty they waddled their way along the corridors towards the Medical block. They had to stop several times as Charles was wracked with new and more powerful contractions, and had to lean against the wall. Steve began to panic, even though he knew it was unlikely that Charles would actually give birth there and then. He had made a point of studying the process of childbirth, largely for his own sake, but the sudden realization that it was actually happening to his friend made him feel nervous. There was so much that might go wrong, even under the Machine’s solicitous care. Eventually they reached the Medical room, and Steve pressed his hand against the panel by the door.

“Do you have an appointment G11?” the Machine’s metallic voice asked him. He gritted his teeth. Surely the bloody Machine should have been monitoring Charles for this eventuality?

“No,” he snapped. “It’s G15. I think he’s going into labour.”

There was a brief pause before the door whooshed open, and Steve led his friend in, and led him over to the couch. “I don’t want to lie down!” Charles snapped, and began pacing the small room. Steve watched him with concern.

“Well here we are then,” the Machine suddenly said, switching automatically to its irritating midwife mode. “Just lay yourself down on the couch dear, and we’ll have a look to see what’s going on.”

“I don’t want to lie down!” Charles repeated, and then grunted as another contraction hit him.

“Well I think it would be best. We need to see how far you’ve progressed.” Midwife machine said.

“All bloody right then,” Charles said, and with surprising quickness if not elegance, pulled himself onto the couch as requested. Almost immediately, all sorts of feelers and devices emerged from the main medical console, and began to probe Charles, attaching themselves to his abdomen, while another set of artificial arms placed themselves under his knees, and lifted them upwards.

“Careful!” Charles snapped.

Steve felt helpless for a moment. “Shall I go and see if I can get hold of Sylvia? She ought to be here.”

“No!” Charles snapped once more. “I don’t want her here.” He grunted again, and then arched his back as one of the Machine’s probes snaked between his legs and from the expression on his face, subjected him to a rather intimate examination.

“Well she is the father,” Steve went on, as Charles seemed to relax a little again.

“I don’t care!” he snapped once more. “You can stay, and Jacquie can come as well. But I don’t want anyone else.”
Steve looked around the room, and found a chair on which to sit. Standing in his current state for more than a couple of minutes was something of a strain, and he was exhausted from dragging Charles all the way from the Refectory.

“Well dear,” the Machine midwife told them. “Things are going quite well. You’re already dilated by two and a half centimetres, and the baby seems to be doing quite well.”

Charles had his eyes shut, riding out another spasm as this news was conveyed. “When you feel up to it, we’ll go through your birth plan, and make sure you’ve got everything you want.”

Steve remembered birth plans. The Machine had tried unsuccessfully to interest him in one on his last check up. Who did he want there with him, what pain relief did he think he might want? Steve had decided to leave those questions until later. There were times when he wanted Karen to be with him, and others when he would rather have sawn his leg off that let her see him in such an undignified position.

“I don’t want to make any changes,” Charles shouted between holding his breath. “No pain relief, and only G11 and G8 here!”

“Well you can always change your mind later dear. I’ll inform G8 now,” the Machine replied, its tone so irritatingly understanding. Steve sighed, and grabbed hold of Charles’ hand. He seemed to be sleeping now, or at any rate, resting. The Machine’s more intrusive probes were removed, and silence enveloped the room.

The door opening startled Steve. He had dozed off in the cozy warmth of the Medical facility. He stared at the door. It was Jacquie, her hair tied back, and her stomach protruding in front of her as she came into the room. She looked at the supine figure of Charles on the couch.

“How is he?” she whispered, not wanting to wake the boy.

“All right,” Steve told her, smiling. “He was a bit grumpy for a bit, but I think he’s sleeping now.”

“Poor thing.” Jacquie found herself another chair, and moved it nearer to the couch, and then sat on it. “I’ve brought some chocolate,” she said.

Steve looked down at Charles, his breathing now fairly regular, apart from the occasional grunt. “I’m not sure he can have any just yet.”

“Not for him, silly! For me and you!” Jacquie broke off a couple of squares and passed them over to Steve. “We have to keep our strength up too, if we’re going to be any use!”

Steve nodded, and suddenly realizing that he was indeed hungry, he slipped the chocolate into his mouth. It tasted a little sour, as it had done for the past few months, but he chewed it eagerly enough, and swallowed gratefully.

“Does he still not want Sylvia here?” Jacquie whispered. Steve shook his head. “I don’t know,” Jacquie went on. “I think if a boy had got me into this state, rather than the Machine, I’d have wanted him here, just to make him suffer!”

Steve smiled at her. Charles was the only one of the three of them who had got pregnant in the traditional manner. He and Jacquie had been artificially inseminated. “So you won’t be inviting Malcolm?”

Jacquie pulled a face, and then shook her head. “No, I don’t think so. He’s offered of course.”

“Yeah, so did Eddie,” Steve put in. Charles groaned once more, and his face contorted as another spasm leapt across his abdomen. The other two looked on in concern for a few moments, then Charles slowly settled back.

“How long do you think it’ll take?” Jacquie asked.

“I don’t know. The Machine said he was two and a half centimetres a while ago.” Steve told her, looking down at the sleeping form of Charles. “I suppose it could take some time yet.”
Jacquie nodded grimly. “I can’t say I’m looking forward to it,” she mused. “Not watching Charles that is, I mean having to go through it myself.”

Steve nodded, and sighed. Not having a vagina, he wouldn’t have to go through the process quite like this. He felt he should be pleased about that, and tried to be, but somehow instead he felt bereft, cheated even, that he wouldn’t experience birth as nature intended. Charles stirred once more, and groaned, grabbing Steve’s hand and squeezing hard. “There there,” Steve soothed. The other boy opened his eyes, and looked wildly around the room.

“That fucking hurt!” Charles exclaimed. Steve smiled.

“Jacquie’s here to help,” he said, as brightly as he could.

Charles lifted his head, and nodded to the girl, before collapsing back onto the bed. “God, if I’d have known it would be like this, I’m not sure I would have ever let Sylvia talk me into swapping!” he gasped.

Steve raised his eyebrows. “Well,” he said hesitantly. “Wasn’t it more your idea than hers?”

Charles cried out once more, and grabbed Steve’s hand so hard that it hurt. It was a minute or two before he relaxed once more. “I don’t remember,” he muttered, picking up on Steve’s thread. “But just at this moment, she’d be bloody welcome to it!”

Jacquie moved her chair a little closer, and took hold of Charles’ other hand. “Well I’m sure she wouldn’t be as good at it as you are, darling.”

“No,” Steve agreed. The thought of Sylvia, as she was now, attempting to give birth, was absurd. Nearly two meters tall, and heavily built, she towered over the whole crew, even Karen and Stuart.

Minutes turned to hours as the three of them waited in the dark, warm room. The Machine announced that it was going to check Charles out once more, and sent its probes into his nether regions. Steve felt sure, given the length of time, and the pain Charles had experienced, that he must be nearly fully dilated by now. “Very good dear,” the Machine midwife clucked to him. “Nearly four centimetres now!”

“Four!” gasped Steve, disbelievingly. The Machine made no reply, and withdrew its probes.

“And baby’s doing fine!” the Machine reassured them, although none of them had asked. Steve looked at Jacquie for a moment, and then patted Charles’ hand.

“You’re doing really well,” he assured him.

Another couple of hours passed. Steve and Jacquie both dozed from time to time, and competed in martyrdom by each suggesting that the other might want to go back to their room, or go off for something to eat, and then each refusing in turn. Charles’ contractions were becoming more regular now, and the gaps between them fewer and shorter. Steve wondered whether he should suggest to the Machine that it do its checks again, but was stopped by the boy himself suddenly exclaiming something.

“Oh God what was that?” he grunted. “I’ve just wet myself I think.”

Steve glanced at Jacquie nervously. Should they check what Charles was asserting, and try and make him more comfortable? The Machine however intervened.

“Let’s just take another little look,” it announced, as its invasive probes extended once more between Charles’ legs. “Oh that’s good!” it exclaimed. “You’re doing really well. Eight centimetres now. We’d better get you ready to start pushing in a minute.”

Steve noticed that Charles’ eyes widened in fear at this announcement. He squeezed the damp hand he held once more. “It’ll be fine,” he assured the figure on the couch.

“Yes,” Jacquie agreed brightly. Her eyes met Steve’s across the supine figure, and there was concern on both their faces.

“I’m frightened!” Charles whimpered.

“Of course you are,” Steve told him, and then winced as Charles grabbed his hand with ferocity to ride out another contraction. Half an hour passed, and then another. The Machine remained silent, in spite of its earlier promise that Charles was nearly ready to push.

“I need a drink,” Charles muttered. Steve stood as quickly as he was able, and went over to get his friend one. Once he was up and about, he realized that he needed to wee. Handing the drink over to Jacquie to hold, he found the toilet at the back of the room and relieved himself.

“Steve!” he heard Jacquie’s voice as he was washing his hands. “I think it’s time!”

He quickly returned to his post, and saw Charles thrusting his shoulders back into the couch, and screaming in agony. It was agony to watch too.

“Machine!” Steve shouted in a demanding tone. “What’s happening?”

There was a whirr as the medical Machinery woke from its slumber. “Well let’s just see,” it said brightly.

“Don’t touch me!” Charles screamed, as the probes attempted to worm between his legs once more. He thrashed at them with his hands.

“Now now,” the Machine soothed him. “We just need to have a little look.”

Charles’ face contorted and his back arched. He stayed in this position for five or six seconds before slumping back onto the couch. “Oh that’s very good!” the Machine congratulated him. “Do you want to see if you can push?”

“No,” Charles grunted, and then. “Yes,” contradicting himself immediately.

“Okay, now remember how we practiced,” the Machine cooed on.

Charles’ breathing became a little ragged, as Jacquie and Steve looked on anxiously. Then, the slow wave of agony began in his body once more. “Push!” the Machine urged.

“I am bloody pushing!” Charles spat back, just before screaming once more. Jacquie picked up a flannel, and wiped his face, as he slumped back onto the couch. “I can’t take much more of this!”

“Of course you can,” Steve assured him.

“You wait until it’s your bloody turn!” Charles rose up, and screamed once more.

“Oh that’s really good!” the Machine encouraged him. “Really good! We can detect the baby’s head!”

“So can I!” Charles pointed out between gritted teeth, as he slumped back once more. He looked beyond fatigued. Steve was worried whether his friend would actually be able to see the whole process through; he looked on the point of collapse. Four or five more spasms shot through the poor boy without perceivable results, while Jacquie and Steve stood by in sympathetic silence.

“Now let’s have one really big push this time!” the Midwife in the Machine suggested. Steve looked at Charles’ face, wracked with pain and exhaustion. Surely he wouldn’t be able to do what the Machine was suggesting, it was impossible? “It’s going to be easy,” the Machine asserted. “With your female spirit, you’ll find it easy!”

Steve jumped at this. The midwife persona of the Machine had made him forget that the intelligence assisting at this birth was the same as the one that had robbed him of his masculinity so many months before; the one who dealt in male and female spirits. He glanced over at Jacquie. Her spirit was not as feminine as his or Charles’ apparently; did that mean that her birth would be all the more troubled?

His train of thought was broken by another scream from Charles, and to his amazement, Steve saw a small patch of damp hair pressing out from between the lips of the poor boy’s vagina. My God, he thought to himself, that was the baby! His mouth fell open in wonder, as he noticed Charles’ grip on his hand grow tighter once more. “One big push!” the Machine suggested. Charles was obviously too tired to respond in words to this challenge, and began to scream once more. The small patch of hair edged forward, stretching the skin around it almost to breaking point. Steve felt himself wince, and then Charles’ spasm relented once more. Jacquie touched his arm, and nodded towards the nearly emergent infant. Steve nodded, and smiled back at her, unable to speak.

“Oh God!” Charles hissed once more, as his pelvis lifted itself upwards. He screamed, was silent for a second, and then screamed louder than he had before. It was perhaps the loudest scream Steve had ever heard. His eyes wide with alarm, he bit his lip as he stared at Charles’ contorted face.

“Oh my!” he heard Jacquie gasp. He looked first at her, and then at Charles’ exposed vagina. There, like it was wearing a rather too tight turtle-necked jumper, was the head of a baby, covered in gore, and its eyes tight shut.

“One more push!” the Machine urged. Charles was panting, and had let go of his friends’ hands, flaying wildly at the air. A low sound started to emanate from his throat, and as his pelvis lifted once more, it rose in pitch to become a primal scream. With a gurgling, plopping noise, the baby’s head shifted, and its body emerged from Charles’ birth canal. The expert claws of the midwife Machine caught it, as Steve and Jacquie looked on in wonder.

“It’s a boy!” Jacquie gasped.

“It has male genital organs,” the Machine said by way of correction, although seemingly for its own benefit.  Its claws lifted the baby gently, and with its umbilical cord still intact, placed it on Charles’ heaving chest. The boy raised his head to look down, and gave out an anguished cry, as his arms, trembling, reached out to touch it tentatively.

“Oh my God,” he stuttered. The scene became cloudy to Steve, as tears welled into his eyes. “Oh my God. My baby!” Charles said again, and Steve heard a muffled sob from Jacquie on the other side of the couch. “We’ve done it!”

“He’s beautiful,” Steve heard himself whisper. “He’s so beautiful.”

“I know!” Charles responded, cradling the baby against himself. He kissed its head, as its tiny arms flayed aimlessly in the air.

“We’ll just take him for a moment, so we can check he’s happy,” the Midwife Machine announced, as it moved its claws forward once more. Instinctively, Charles held the baby tighter for a moment, until rational thought seemed to tell him to allow the Machine what it wanted. “You can have him back straight away.” Midwife Machine assured him.

The baby was whisked towards the back of the room, and let out a mew of distress. Steve felt his entire soul jump at the sound, ready to leap to the baby’s defence. He was drawn back to the scene of the birth by the renewed sounds of joyful sobbing, from both Jacquie and Charles.

“Oh you were so brave!” Jacquie said, between sobs, hugging the boy on the bed. His eyes were awash with tears, mingling with the sweat on his face.

“It was easy,” he announced, and then began to laugh. Steve joined the huddle, but felt unable to say anything. He only wished that his birth might be as magical.

They stayed with Charles for some time after his placenta was delivered, crying and laughing together. Steve felt himself electrified by the magic of the moment, and when Charles offered him the baby to cuddle, he couldn’t suppress the gasp that leapt from his throat. He looked down through clouded eyes at the tiny thing he held in his arms, and kissed its hot little forehead tenderly. The smell was intoxicating, like some primeval drug, and he held his face against the baby’s simply to inhale more of it.

“I’ll have him back now,” Charles said, with a note of proprietary concern. Steve smiled wistfully, and kissed the baby once more, before returning him to his mother. He and Jacquie were allowed one more hold of the baby each, before the Machine suggested that the three of them could do with some sleep. It assured them that it would look after the baby, and wake Charles if anything was needed. With some reluctance, and much hugging and kissing, Jacquie and Steve broke up the party by eventually leaving and going back to the girls’ sleeping quarters, exhausted and happy.

Steve must have been far more tired than he knew. He slept for at least four hours before having to get up for a wee, and even then, collapsed back into his bed for another two and a half hours before waking again. He pulled himself upright on the bed, his large stomach hanging over his legs in front of him in its rather quaint cotton nightie, and laughed to himself. There had been a time when he had secretly thought to himself that being a girl meant being rather elegant; sophisticated even. He hardly fitted those criteria now. He rubbed his eyes, and remembered the events of the day before; Charles and the baby. He had to go and see them, and now! He pulled himself to his feet, and went through to the shower that he used to share with Jeanette. She was down on the planet now, so he knew he wouldn’t be disturbed. He let the water trickle comfortingly over his body, and through his long, lustrous hair. Somehow it had gotten thicker since his pregnancy. It was one of the few things he liked about his present condition. Jacquie and he had at first giggled that their boobs looked perkier, but over the past two or three months they simply looked swollen and engorged. Hair was a different matter, and he liked the way if felt.

He dried himself off, and got dressed. It was possible, he supposed, that the Machine would have let him wear trousers these days. After all, he thought ruefully, as he rubbed his swollen stomach to quieten the leaping baby, his femininity was hardly in doubt. He hadn’t bothered to try to get trousers for a long time however. He felt more comfortable in loose fitting dresses, however unfashionable and inelegant they might be. Wearing trousers never really crossed his mind. He brushed his hair through, and tied it back with a red bow, before putting on a minimum of make up. It was a fancy, he knew, but he felt he should still make some effort to look attractive. Satisfied as he could be with his appearance, he left his room, and made his way towards the Medical Facility, where he assumed Charles and the baby would still be. He wondered whether he should wake Jacquie so she could come along with him. He decided against it. It was kinder to let her sleep in, he thought. Besides, if it was only him visiting, he would get more holds of the baby.

With this thought he smiled, and walked along the corridors as quickly and brightly as he had done for months. He was stopped in his tracks by the sight of two others heading in the same direction as him. His heart sank as he saw Sylvia and Sarah stomping and laughing together.

“Am I cool or what?” Sylvia announced in a loud baritone, accompanied with a lot of laughter. God she was so tall, Steve inadvertently thought to himself as he looked at her. Weeks living down with the heavier gravity of the planet, together with physical labour, had toned her already bulky body considerably. “I shagged him until he got up the duff, and not only that, I made sure he had a boy as well!”

“You sure did!” Sandra replied, slapping her friend on the back. She too, was more muscular than Steve remembered from when he last had seen her; more muscular and with shorter hair. She seemed to have taken a razor to it. It was short against her scalp, showing the individual veins out in blue against her skin.

They saw him. Damn, he thought to himself. They stopped, and watched him approaching. Sylvia smiled. “Hi there, beautiful,” she shouted. “Have you come to congratulate me?”

He stopped a few feet from them, suddenly weary. “Hardly,” he said quietly. “You didn’t do anything.”

“Oh I don’t know about that!” Sylvia announced, putting her arm around Sandra’s shoulders, and beaming stupidly. “I did quite enough, if you know what I mean!” She and Sandra sniggered, and looked back to Steve, as if daring him to contradict them.

“Well, Charles had to do most of the work,” he muttered, and tried to move forward again.

“You never told me that!” Sandra said to Sylvia, a huge grin on her face. She thrust her hips forwards and backwards a few times. “You got him to do all the work, did you? You lazy bugger!” Sylvia sniggered once more.

“Look, I don’t think you’re being very clever,” Steve told them haughtily. “And if you’re thinking of going to see Charles and the baby, I’d calm down a little first.”

They both laughed once more. “I think I was clever enough don’t you?” Sylvia said to him, a suggestive note in her voice, and her hand falling to groin level. “Cleverer than you ever were when you had one of these!” Sandra and Sylvia both laughed, and Steve felt himself flush.

“Well I’m off to see Charles while you two gloat,” he told them, walking past them with his head held high.

“Just a second!” Sylvia said. “I’ve got the right to go first you know. I am the bloody thing’s father! Even if Charles tries to deny it.”

“Yeah!” Sandra agreed. Steve stopped in his tracks. Much as it galled him, he realized that this was a legitimate claim. He gritted his teeth once more.

“All right,” he said, “Come on then, I’ll show you the way.”
He was determined to walk in front of the other two, but his bulk, and their agility made this impossible, and within a few yards they were on either side of him, dwarfing him as they loped along beside him like two prowling wolves. The three of them reached the Medical Centre, and he put his hand towards the panel. Sandra grabbed it.

“No you don’t, pretty one,” she sneered. “I think the father should go first, don’t you?” She leered into Steve’s face, and he smelt something stale on her breath. He pulled away and wrinkled his nose. Sylvia gleefully leapt forward, and placed her massive palm on the panel instead.

“Welcome B14. You have been expected.” The Machine intoned. The door swooshed open for a few seconds, giving Steve a tantalising glimpse of the darkened scene inside, and the haunting sound of the baby mewing. Then, swallowing Sylvia, it shut again. He stomped off down the corridor a few paces to look for somewhere to sit. He found a stool, and plonked himself down. Much to his annoyance, Sandra had also come along with him. She stood looking at him with her arms folded, and a strange self -satisfied look on her face.

“Well look at you,” she sneered. He pointedly looked down the empty corridor to his left. “You look bloody enormous. Fit to burst in fact!”

He glared back at her. “Thank you very much,” he sneered.

The girl laughed unkindly. “Well don’t blame me. I didn’t do it to you. Much as I might have wanted to. Still, you’re not quite the beauty you used to be are you?” she went on, pacing around and trying to catch his eye. “It must be really humiliating for you as well, being pregnant like that. I know I’d hate it.”

“It’s all right,” Steve muttered defensively. “I don’t mind.”

“You must do!” Sandra insisted. “I mean, for God’s sake, you used to be a boy! Not a very good one, but a boy nonetheless. Now look at you! Boobs the size of footballs, and a bloody great stomach full of baby.” She paused to laugh. “I just wish that some of the women on old Earth could see you now! That would make them laugh!”

Steve glared at her in spite of himself. “Why do you say that?” he demanded.

She glared back, and tilted her head to one side. “They’d have been really pleased to know that after all those years of suppression, that we’d managed to turn the tables here. They’d have been really pleased!”

“You don’t know that!” Steve snapped, grimacing as his baby kicked out again.

Sandra laughed. “Oh I think I do! Anyway, at least I’m here to see it! The boy who used to take the piss out of me all the time when I was a kid, sitting there in that state! It’s fantastic, I can tell you!”

Steve stood up. “I’m going back to my room,” he announced. “I’ll come back when you two have gone!”

Sandra sneered once more as he waddled past her, trying his utmost to be as dignified. Why was she being so horrible to him? Once he was out of sight, he allowed himself a couple of tears before moving on back towards the sleeping quarters. He bumped into Jacquie in the Archway, dressed much as he was, and obviously intent on the same mission.

“Have you been to see Charles and the baby?” she asked him. “Oh God, I wonder what he’s going to call him? We can’t call him baby forever, can we?”

Steve shook his head mournfully. “No,” he replied. “But don’t go now Jacquie; Sylvia’s suddenly discovered the joys of fatherhood. She’s in there with them at the moment.”

“Oh bugger! I wanted to cuddle him again!” Jacquie exclaimed. She looked at Steve more carefully. “Are you all right?”

“No!” he muttered. “Sandra was being really horrible to me. She said I was fat and ugly!”

“Oh that’s so nasty! Come on, let’s sit down for a moment.” She led Steve over to the chairs in the common area, and they both sat down. “She can be a right cow that Sandra, she always could.”

Steve nodded in response. “She’s the only one who’s been horrible to me since I changed over really.”

Jacquie looked doleful for a moment. “Gloria and me weren’t all that friendly to start with were we?”

He looked at her and smiled. “Well not for a while, but we got over that.”

“I’m sorry Steve,” she said, looking at the floor. “I wasn’t all that clever then.”

“None of us were,” he said, holding her hand. “It was my fault really. Bursting into the girls’ circle like that. I didn’t know what I was supposed to do.”

“No,” Jacquie agreed. “But we should have helped you settle in. Like Jeanette and Sarah did. Me and Gloria were scared of you.”

“Scared of me? I’m not really that frightening.”

She laughed. “No. But you’re very beautiful. That’s what we didn’t like. I wanted to be more like you.”

She gazed ruefully at him, and he smiled. “Well I’m not that beautiful now. Look at me; Sandra’s right about that if nothing else.”

They both laughed. “I don’t think so,” Jacquie said. “I think we’re as beautiful as we ever will be. It’s just a case of how you look at it.” They smiled and hugged, separating only when Steve’s baby reminded him of its presence and her wakefulness with a playful kick under his ribs.

“I wondered if I might find you two here.” They froze, and turned to look at the Archway. Framed in it was someone they had never seen before, a woman; a full-grown woman. She was tall and gaunt, and wearing a dull dark blue uniform. She smiled. She had wrinkles on her face like, well, like their mothers. She walked over to them, still smiling benignly.

“Well how long have you got to go?” she asked, sitting down opposite them and leaning in their direction.

“A couple of months,” Jacquie said quietly. “Who are you?”

The woman laughed. “Sorry, I should have introduced myself. It must be a bit of a shock seeing me here.” She looked around the room carefully, at the ceiling and the doors. “It’s changed a bit around here, I can tell you that.”

“But who are you?” Jacquie asked once more.

“I’m Alison,” she announced, standing and moving over to them with an extended hand. Both the pregnant teenagers looked at each other, baffled, without responding to the gesture. “Let me see,” the woman went on. “I looked this up. Yes, I’m Sarah’s grandmother.”

Steve’s mouth fell open. “Grandmother?” he parroted.

“That’s right.” She sat down next to them. “I’ve been revived, as you can see. The Machine thought I might be able to help. I used to be a midwife of sorts. Now, which one of you used to be a boy?”

Steve was taken aback with her directness, and felt ashamed for a moment. “Me,” he responded at last. “I still am a boy as it happens.”

The woman raised her eyebrows and laughed, but not unkindly. “Well I’m not so sure about that honey,” she replied, looking down at his stomach. “Boys don’t normally have this sort of trouble; not in my experience anyway, and I’ve seen a good few more pregnancies than you have.”

Steve looked at her in amazement; a grandmother. One of the original crew, this woman had been born on old Earth. She had lived there! He blinked to check that this was no ghost he was seeing, but she remained there, as real as him, smiling kindly at the two of them.

“You’re Sarah’s grandmother?” Jacquie asked, roused from silence at last.

“Yes,” the woman replied. “Her father was my son; my only son.” She looked wistful for a moment. “It seems like it was only yesterday when I saw him. He was sixteen then. Just sixteen.”

Steve felt her grief, and reached out his arm to touch hers. He thought about Sarah’s father, a small, rather fussy little man, who his own father used to make fun of. “He was a wonderful man,” he assured her. “Absolutely wonderful.”

The woman’s eyes returned to the present, and she smiled at Steve and hugged his head to her shoulder. She gazed at him with a strange look on her face, as if examining him in detail. Steve began to feel a little uncomfortable. Then she spoke again. “Thank you,” she whispered. “The Machine’s right. You are special; so very, very special.”

Chapter Two

Over the next few days Steve fretted a little about what Alison had said. The Machine had told her he was special, but what did it mean by that? She had seemed to imply that it was more than him just being someone who was once a boy, and now was an expectant mother. Alison refused to offer any further information however, evading all his questions on the subject, no matter how he phrased them.

And he had other things to think about anyway. First and foremost was the baby; Greg, as Charles had called him. He was adorable, and Steve took every opportunity he could to hold the little thing, to cuddle and kiss him, and to talk to him. He even introduced Greg to his own baby, quietly, so no one would hear. His own baby gave a little kick in response, and he smiled to himself at his little conceit.

Alison showed him, Charles and Jacquie some of the secrets of  baby care. He paid full and rapt attention. He was determined to be the best mother any baby had ever had, and he told his baby so as a solemn, if silent, oath. Charles had some trouble with breastfeeding, wincing with pain as little Greg latched onto him. Alison seemed obsessed with breastfeeding, it seemed to Steve. It was better for baby, and it was better for him, or so she said. He and Jacquie laughed about it, as she went over and over the details of what to do with them. Secretly though, Steve ached to try it out himself. He was sure he could do better than Charles; he would withstand the pain and the tiredness better, he was convinced, and would make sure his little angel received all the nourishment it needed.

“Well I don’t know,” Alison tutted, and Charles held little Greg to his engorged breasts. “I think you might have been a bit too impatient to be honest.”

Charles blinked woefully at her, as his mouth screwed up in pain. “What do you mean?”

“Well,” Alison went on. “Getting yourself pregnant when your breasts had hardly started to grow.”

“Well I didn’t mean to!” Charles protested.

“No, maybe not. But you should have been more careful!” the older woman scolded. Her face then broke into a smile. “Still, having seen, what was his name? Sylvia? I can see why you fell for him. He’s a real hunk, and no mistake!”

Charles blinked once or twice more in a surprised sort of way, and pouted rather helplessly. “Oh!” he gasped, looking down at the precious bundle in his arms. “I think he’s getting some now!”

“Good,” Alison told him. “We’ll check on his weight later. I don’t know. I knew I might get revived quicker than the others to help out with babies and things, but I never thought I’d end up teaching boys to breastfeed! The Machine should have done it earlier, while you were still expecting. Then I could have got you ready quicker.”

“I’m not a boy!” Charles protested.

“Well not now. But he,” she went on, nodding towards Steve. “Well he says he still is a boy.”

It was Steve’s turn to be shocked at her comments. “Well I am in a way,” he insisted.

Alison looked at him in her usual kindly way. “Yes, but it’s a bit bloody awkward you know, you refusing to have your bits put right! Why on Earth did you get yourself pregnant without thinking of that?”

“I didn’t ask to get pregnant. The Machine did it to me!”

“Hmm,” Alison went on disbelievingly. “Hold him a bit higher,” she said to Charles. “That’s it. Good.”

Steve looked at her, angry that she seemed disinclined to believe his version of events. “It’s true!” he insisted. “The Machine got Jacquie and me pregnant without our permission!”

“Oh I know that dear,” she went on, fussing with the blanket that surrounded the baby. “I just meant you should have got your bits sorted out when you had the chance.”

“It didn’t seem right,” Steve muttered.

“Well,” she went on. “It’s going to be a new experience for me helping someone who’s got a Willy give birth, and that’s no mistake!”

Steve felt unfairly criticized. “Well it’s hardly big enough to get in the way. You wouldn’t know it was there, unless you really looked. You can’t see it through my panties or anything!”

 She stopped her fussing, and held her hand out to him. “I didn’t mean to upset you dear. I’m sorry.” He took her hand and they smiled at one another. Steve liked this woman, in spite of her brusque manner. She reminded him a little of his own mother. She started to laugh.

“What is it?” he asked.

“Well. I was just thinking. I wish I could beam some pictures of you and Charles here back in time. To Earth that is.”

“Why?” Steve asked.

She smiled again. “Well there’d be thousands of generations of women who’d take real delight in knowing that there were two boys here who’d got themselves pregnant. They’d have loved it!”

Steve was surprised at this. “Sandra said something similar to me a while ago,” he mused.

“Well she obviously paid more attention to Earth History than you ever did!” Alison countered. “Now come on Charles. You’d best switch him over to the other side.”

Another advantage for Steve in Alison’s revival was that Sarah, her granddaughter, made an impromptu return to the ship. He was delighted to see her, and hugged and kissed her as soon as she was on board. There were unashamed tears in both of their eyes.

“Well look at you!” Sarah exclaimed, as they held hands and grinned foolishly at each other. “You look lovely!”

“I don’t,” Steve complained. “I look big and fat.”

Sarah laughed. “Well you a bit larger than when I saw you last. But it suits you!”

Steve smiled, and they walked hand in hand along the corridors towards the Maternity suite where Charles was, and Alison was normally to be found.

“And what about you?” Steve asked. “How are things with you down on Planet?”

“Okay,” Sarah replied, grinning sheepishly. Steve waited for her to enlighten him on the subject of her amusement, but she did not.

“Well tell me!” he said, playfully tapping her arm. “Still no luck with Malcolm I suppose?”

“No,” Sarah said dismissively, and pouting a little. “He snogs Eddie all the time these days, and I don’t care!” Steve was less than certain that this was the case, but nodded sagely. “Anyway,” Sarah went on. “I’ve become quite good friends with Peter!”

“Peter!” Steve gasped, stopping her by standing in front of her and halting their progress. She nodded, and grinned impishly. “Oh Sarah that’s good news. He’s nice.”

“Yes he is,” she agreed. “He’s kind and sensible, and” she added in a whisper. “Really gentle!”

“Oh my God Sarah!” Steve squealed. “You mean?”

She shook her head. “No. Not yet. But I don’t think it’ll be long!” Steve bit his lip, and then giggled. He was really pleased for his friend, the friend he thought of as a sister. He smiled fondly at her, and hugged her once more, in spite of the difficulty caused by his swollen stomach. The baby inside kicked him in protest.

“What’s she like?” Sarah asked.

“Your grandmother?” She nodded, as the two of them resumed their progress. “She’s really nice,” Steve went on. “And she knows a lot about babies. You know Charles has had his don’t you? He’s called Greg, and he’s lovely!”

“Yes, I heard,” Sarah told him. “Sylvia was bragging about it all over the camp as soon as she got the news. It was pathetic.”

Steve nodded. “Yes, she was a bit of a pain when she came up here to the ship.”

“Does she want to see me?” Sarah asked, returning to her theme. Steve sighed. Alison hadn’t really mentioned Sarah, other than to point out their connection. If she missed anyone, it seemed to be her son, Sarah’s father, rather than his friend herself.

“Yes,” he said uncertainly. “Of course she does. You’re her flesh and blood.”

“Well I’m a bit frightened about seeing her to be honest.” Sarah went on. “She might be disappointed in me.”

Steve stopped her again. “Oh of course she won’t Sarah! How could you say such a thing? You’re so clever, and everything! God, you know more about Biology and stuff like that than anyone!”

Sarah smiled. “Yes,” she conceded. “Although Eddie seems to have a natural gift for the animals down there. You should see him! They follow him about like in that story about the Pied Piper, do you remember that?”

Steve nodded. “Come on!” he said encouragingly. “Let’s go and introduce you to your grandmother.”

They reached the Medical facility, and Steve placed his palm on the door. He was a recognized visitor to Charles and the baby, and knew he would have no trouble in gaining entry. The door swooshed open without comment from the Machine, and they both went into the still dark and oppressively warm room.

“Hi,” Steve said brightly to Alison, who was doing something over at the back amongst the machinery. “This is Sarah, your granddaughter.”

The woman turned, and looked over, her eyes widening as she saw her new relative. The two of them stared in silence and something like shock at each other for several seconds. “Sarah,” she gasped at last.

“Grandmother!” Sarah sobbed, and they rushed to meet each other in an embrace in the centre of the room. Steve felt a bit of an intruder, and turned his eyes to see Charles asleep. In the little cot beside him, Greg was stirring, his tiny pink arms waving. Then Steve had an idea that almost made him feel ashamed because of its selfishness. He turned to Alison and Sarah, and coughed.

“Why don’t you two go off to the Refectory or something?” he suggested. “I can keep an eye on things here.”

Alison separated, and turned to stare at him. “Well, are you sure?”

He nodded enthusiastically. “Of course. I can always get the Machine to call for you if I get in trouble or anything. Go and catch up with things. You must have a lot to talk about.”

Alison stared at him for a few moments, and then broke into a smile and nodded. “All right,” she agreed. “We’ll do that. I can trust you to look after these two, I’m sure.” She turned to Sarah. “He’s been so quick to pick up on baby care; I’d swear he knows almost as much as me already! He’s going to make the perfect mother when his time comes, I’m sure of that.”

Steve felt himself blushing at this unexpected praise, as Sarah and Alison beamed across at him. He smiled back, and hugged the two of them before shooing them out of the door, and sitting down next to the little crib. He looked in at the little figure inside, its eyes now open, and staring wildly and unknowingly at its surroundings. Steve’s face fell into a smile, and he slipped a hand into the crib, and watched, fascinated, as little Greg’s tiny fingers wrapped themselves around one of his. The baby murmured, and he shushed it, not wanting Charles to wake.

The baby was such a perfect thing. Would his own be as perfect? Was there something deeper in what Alison had said before? Would his refusal to allow the Machine to put his genital anomalies right damage his baby in some way? God, he would never forgive himself it that was the case. But surely the Machine wouldn’t have let things go on if that was true? It wouldn’t have allowed his baby to be damaged. He had been examined regularly, and the Machine, in its irritating midwife mode, had assured, reassured, and re-reassured him that everything with the baby was fine on each occasion. But still Steve worried.

Greg murmured again, and gave out a little yelp, although he didn’t seem all that distressed. Steve glanced nervously at the sleeping Charles, who sighed and turned over. Greg gave another little yell, and deciding so unselfishly that Charles probably needed more sleep, Steve leaned into the crib, and delicately picked the baby up, cradling his little head in one of his hands. He sat himself back down, and rocked the baby too and fro in his arms, singing softly to it, between kisses on its hot little forehead. Oh it smelt so wonderful, he told himself, inhaling the infant’s smell, and closing his own eyes to appreciate it more. It was the most wonderful thing he had ever smelt, better even than the comforting and musky scent of Karen, when he rested his head on her broad chest. Yes, the smell of baby was something he could spend the rest of his life enjoying.

He lifted Greg up to look into his beautiful little face, so innocent and so helpless. Greg’s face contorted a little, as his mouth opened and shut, seeking something on which it might attach. Steve smiled back, and wrinkled his own face in imitation, before kissing the baby once more.

“You’re such a lucky little fellow!” he whispered to it. “You’ve got a whole new planet to go and explore. And she’ll look after you if you look after her. She’ll look after you as long as she lasts, and that’s a very long time.” He paused to kiss the baby again, as its misty eyes seemed to try and focus on his face. “And you’re so beautiful too!” He thought for a moment, frowning to himself before continuing. “I know you’re a boy, but I hope you grow up more like your mother than your father.” He leaned closer to little Greg, as his hands grabbed at Steve’s hair. “Daddy can be a bit over the top at times, a bit too boyish.” He kissed the baby once more, and smiled. “Not that there’s anything wrong with being boyish, especially if you are a boy. But you’ve got to respect other things as well. Girls are people too you know.” His thoughts drifted off into the future. God, one day this little person would know his baby! He might even be his baby’s boyfriend.

“Well if you do want to be my baby’s boyfriend,” he told Greg in a renewed whisper. “You’d better be good to her, that’s all I can say.” Greg flayed his little arms once more, pulling at Steve’s long dark hair. “Careful little man!” Steve told him. “That hurt you know!” He kissed the baby once more, imbuing the intoxicating scent to which he was becoming addicted.

“Oh God, does he want feeding again?” Steve looked around to see Charles looking at him, and felt ashamed. How much of his silly meanderings had Charles heard? He smiled at his friend.

“I think he’s all right for a minute,” he said. “You get some more rest.”

For once Charles’ maternal instincts proved stronger than Steve’s. Greg’s restlessness increased over the following ten minutes, and his occasional little shouts and mews became more insistent. In the end, and with great reluctance, Steve relinquished his charge to Charles, who pulled the top of his nightie down, and allowed a now frantic baby to clasp onto his exposed breast.

“Ah!” Charles gasped, in a mixture of ecstasy and pain, as Greg found his target. Steve watched on in silent fascination as the baby’s ears began to twitch as he suckled. Oh God, he wanted his own baby, and he wanted it now! Once Greg had finished, Steve offered to wind him, and placed the little form over his shoulder, patting his back gently, while Charles went to the Interface at the back of the room to get something to eat.

“I think I’m nearly ready to leave this bloody room, it’s driving me mad!” he said. Steve reluctantly gave some of his attention to something other than Greg for a moment.

“But where will you go?” he said. “Back to the girls’ sleeping quarters?”

“I don’t know. Ha! I wonder if the Machine will let Greg in there, since he’s a boy.”

“Oh of course it will!” Steve gasped, although suddenly wondering whether the Machine would be able to be that flexible. “It would be silly if it didn’t.”

Charles went to the bathroom at the back of the room, and continued the conversation from there. “Well I’ll ask Alison when she’s here. She’s bound to know what’s supposed to happen from before.”

“Yes.”

“Where is she by the way?”

“With Sarah,” Steve told him, as Greg gave a little burp, and a startled sort of jump. “I told them to take some time to get to know one another.”

The toilet flushed, and Charles came back in, looking brighter than he had at any time since Greg’s birth. “Well,” he sighed. “I suppose I’d better change the little blighter now. He’s bound to have filled his nappy if I know him.”

“I’ll do it!” Steve found himself saying.

Charles looked at him and shook his head, smiling. “No, you’ll have to let me do some things Steve. You’ll be busy enough with your own little angel in a few weeks, and you’d hate it if I didn’t know what to do wouldn’t you?”

Steve bit his lip. Greg was Charles’ baby after all. He stood, still holding Greg close to himself, and grudgingly handed him over with one last kiss. He went back over towards his chair. “You look a bit tired,” Charles told him. “Why don’t you go back to your room and rest?”

“I’m all right,” Steve said brightly.

Charles cradled his baby, and sighed. “Look,” he said at last. “I’m not being funny, but I wouldn’t mind a bit of time on my own. What with you and Alison being here all the time, I don’t feel like I’ve gotten to know Greg at all yet.”

Steve felt like a knife had been passed through his heart. Charles saw the anguish on his face. “It’s not that I’m not grateful, it’s just that. Well, you know.”

In spite of himself, Steve nodded, and smiled. He paused on the way out to pat little Greg once more, and once out in the corridor, found himself sobbing. Cross with himself, he dabbed his eyes, and waddled back to the girls’ sleeping quarters to take up Charles’ suggestion that he should rest.

He slept for a couple of hours, before being woken up by the door announcing that Sarah was outside. He blinked a couple of times before slowly raising himself upright. It was odd, he thought, that Sarah should go to the trouble of actually placing her hand on the panel outside his door. In the old days, she would have simply rushed through their shared toilet facility if she wanted to see him. Still, she had been down on the planet for six weeks or more. Perhaps she had got out of the habit. He stumbled across his room, and pushed the panel on his side to let the door open.

“Hi there!” Sarah greeted him brightly. “Is it okay for me to come in?”

“Of course it is, silly.” Steve told her, struggling back across the room to sit on his bed. “Honestly, you used to burst in her unannounced without so much as a by your leave!”

“Yes,” Sarah said, as she walked on in. “But Charles said you were resting. I didn’t want to disturb you.”

He smiled, and rubbed at his stomach as the baby kicked inside him. Sarah’s eyes watched his movement. “Well, what did you think of Alison?” he asked.

Sarah sat herself down on the chair by Steve’s Interface. “She’s really nice,” she said. “I like her.” There was a pause. “She kept going on about my Dad though.”

“Well he was her son,” Steve suggested. “She’s bound to want to know how he got on.”

Sarah nodded. “She had some quite funny stories about him when he was a boy. It was fun listening to them.” Her eyes suddenly looked sad.

Steve nodded. “Do you miss him too?”

Sarah looked intently at him. “Of course I do. Still, it can’t be helped. How have you been? I worry about you up here on your own.”

Steve smiled at her. “I’m not on my own. Charles and Jacquie are always here, and Alison now as well, of course.”

“I know that,” Sarah said. “I meant, well, you know, without me and Jeanette.” Steve smiled. He did know what she meant, and was grateful for her concern. “I feel sort of guilty sometimes,” she went on. “Not being with you, particularly now, when you’re getting so near.”

He laughed. “It’s not that near. I’ve still got 70 days or so to go.”

“Well that’s near enough!”

He smiled. “To be honest Sarah, with carrying all this extra weight around with me, it feels like a life sentence!”

“Yes, it must, you poor thing!” she said, and hugged him gently.

“But you must tell me some news!” he went on. “The last people to come back to the ship were Nigel and Eddie, and they didn’t seem to know anything!”

“No, boys are useless at gossip aren’t they? Well, what can I tell you?”

Steve bit his lip, and shrugged. “Everything! What about you and Peter for a start? How did that happen?”

“Oh well it was just one of those things. I mean, I’ve always thought he was nice, even when we were little. I supposed I always secretly fancied him.” Steve nodded enthusiastically, although it did occur to him that this post hoc rationalization was a bit flimsy. He didn’t recall Sarah ever really talking about Peter in her ‘Malcolm is wonderful’ phase. “Then one day we were having a bit of a laugh after dinner, you know how it is.” Steve nodded enthusiastically. “And he suggested we go and have a look at one of the little streams off to the south. Well it’s ever so nice down there Steve; you really should have a look when you get down.” She blinked once or twice, and Steve simply nodded for her to continue. She looked a little sheepish. “Well, it was getting dark, but the big purple planet was high up that night, and we sort of decided to sit down and look at it.”

“That sounds nice,” Steve told her.

“Oh well you can imagine the rest!” she said. They giggled and held each other’s hands.

“Well perhaps I can,” Steve admitted. “And was it nice?”

“Oh God no!” Sarah gasped. “I was petrified when he started kissing me! I mean, I was still wearing work overalls, and I hadn’t shaved my legs for weeks or anything!”

“Well he wouldn’t have noticed that through the overalls,” Steve pointed out.

“Well maybe not, but you like to be prepared when things like that happen don’t you? God, if I’d have guessed, I’d have made a bit of an effort.”

“I’m sure he didn’t mind,” Steve assured her.

She frowned for a moment, and then smiled once more. “Well he didn’t seem to, I suppose! Anyway, you can be sure that the next night I was a bit more ready for him!”

“I bet you were!” They giggled again. “And now you’re an item?” Steve asked.

Sarah nodded. “I suppose you could say that. We’re not keeping it a secret anyway.”

“Nor should you. I bet Jeanette’s pleased!”

Sarah grinned. “Yes she is. Oh, and she sends her love as well.”

“Is she happy?”

“I think so. She’s very busy with stuff, but she seems happy. Stuart’s not always as attentive as she would like, but he’s busy too.”
”Oh dear, have they had a row or something?”

“One or two, but nothing serious.”

Steve smiled. “What about everyone else?”

She looked at him. “You mean Karen?”

“Maybe,” he said ambiguously, and they laughed again.

“Oh well she seems happy enough. She’s missing you, of course.”

“Of course,” Steve parroted, although secretly pleased.

“And don’t worry, she’s been faithful.”

“I should think so too!”

Sarah giggled. “Well I don’t see that much of her during the day. God, I tell you something though, she’s so strong!”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, she and Stuart were breaking up some rocks to build a new cabin.”

Steve visualized this, and smiled. “With their bare hands?”

“No silly! There are machines for that sort of thing. But one of the machines got stuck in against a rock. And they’re not small, those machines! They must weigh, I don’t know, but lots anyway! I was working near there, and then I saw Karen just lean against it, and push it out of the way! I was amazed, I can tell you!”

“Well they’ve probably got wheels, that would make it easier,” Steve said, although pleasantly running the scene through his mind of a hot sweaty Karen heaving a huge piece of machinery.

“No!” Sarah insisted. “Only sort of caterpillar tracks. But she moved it like it was a feather or something! She really is strong Steve, you’d be amazed!”

Steve realized he probably would, and smiled to himself. “She was probably just showing off.” The picture of Karen, his Karen, heaving a huge machine back into place stayed in his mind however.

They continued chatting for some time. It was as if they had never been separated, and Steve felt reconnected to the world. Once she had gone through all the gossip from the planet, she asked him about his pregnancy. It was hard to talk about it to someone who hadn’t gone through with it, and to be honest, having been stuck in the company of Charles and Jacquie for so long, he felt as if he had talked the subject to death. He did his best to satisfy her curiosity however, and began to feel tired once more.

“The worst thing is not being able to do everything you want to,” he explained.

“Like what? Is there anything I could do for you while I’m up here?” Sarah asked him, eager to help. He looked at her. There was one thing, but he wondered whether he should really ask. “What is it Steve?” she insisted.

“Well,” he began hesitantly. “There is one thing. It sounds a bit silly, but being so fat I just can’t manage it.”

“What is it? Come on, I’d be only too pleased to help.”

Steve bit his lip for a second or too. “Well all right. But don’t laugh or think I’m being silly.”

“I won’t. Come on, tell me and I’ll do it!”

“Well it’s my toes,” Steve said sheepishly. “I can’t bend down to reach them anymore. Do you think you could give them a trim?”

Sarah gasped. “Oh darling, of course I could! You shouldn’t have been afraid to ask!” She hugged him, but he pulled away quickly.

“And when you’ve done that,” he said, quietly. “Could you sort of polish them as well? I hate seeing them without a bit of colour, they look so ugly!”

Sarah laughed, and hugged him again. “It would be a pleasure!” she announced. “Have you got scissors and some nail varnish?”

Steve nodded sheepishly. “They’re in my cupboard in the shower room.”

“What colour do you fancy?” she asked, as she disappeared to search.

“I don’t mind,” he said. “Red or pink, whatever you can find!”

“Okay!”

Soon Sarah was busy with his feet, which he had to admit felt wonderful after their long neglect. He lay down on the bed, with his legs dangling over the side, and shut his eyes while she busied herself with the scissors and file. God, he thought to himself, what would his father make of all this? His son, wearing a silly floral dress, heavily pregnant, and begging a girl to paint his nails for him. The thought made him giggle.

“What’s the matter?” Sarah asked. “Does it tickle?”

“No,” he said. “It’s not that. I was just thinking how odd I must look!”

“No you don’t. You look lovely. Being pregnant suits you, more than Charles or Jacquie, that’s for sure.”

Steve laughed again. “That’s not what I meant. I don’t know why, but I was just thinking about my Mum and Dad, and what they might say if they came in now!”

Sarah thought about this, and began laughing too. “I see what you mean,” she said. “God, I sort of forget you were a boy back then. They’d certainly think you’d changed!”

“Yes!” agreed Steve, giggling to himself once more.

Sarah finished painting his nails, and he leaned over to see what they looked like. He was delighted to see a bit of decoration on them at last, and thanked her profusely. They decided they were hungry, and called in for Jacquie to head off to the Refectory for something to eat. She only nibbled at her food, complaining of feeling sick, and Sarah noticed that Steve didn’t really do justice to his.

They were more or less finished when Charles walked gingerly into the room, carrying little Greg with him. “Charles!” Steve gasped. “You’re up!”

“Yes,” he replied. “I was getting bored stuck in that room.”

“Oh let me take Greg, and you can get yourself something to eat!” Steve suggested enthusiastically. Charles hesitated briefly, and then passed the bundle over to his friend. Steve’s attention was immediately taken up in its entirety with his new if temporary charge. Sarah smiled as she saw him cooing and fussing over the infant in his arms, and stood to get a better look herself.

“Oh he’s lovely!” she said. “I mean, I saw him a bit back in the nursery room, or whatever you call it, but he wasn’t awake then! And he’s gorgeous!”

Steve nodded, rocking the baby back and forth. Sarah noticed the rapt smile on her friend’s face, and the brightness in his eyes. He might have been a boy once, she thought to herself, but he was a natural mother, there was no doubt about that. His assertion of the nurturing role was so strong that she didn’t dare ask to hold the baby herself just then, having to be content with peeking between Steve’s arms into the blanket.

Alison came to join them after half an hour or so, and they spent the rest of the day just sitting around and chatting. Everyone noticed how keen Steve was to hold the baby, and began to make jokes about it, making him blush.

“You make the most of it,” Sarah told little Greg jokingly, having at last gained brief possession of the baby “He’ll have his own little bundle of joy soon, and then he’ll forget all about you!” The others laughed.

“I will not forget about him!” Steve gasped, with genuine pain on his face. “I love all babies!”

“I was only teasing!” Sarah said, shocked at his reaction. “I know you do!”

“Yes,” Alison agreed, looking pleased with the exchange. Steve pouted a little, as he looked from one to the other, and then laughed.

“I’m sorry,” he blurted. “It’s just that he’s so lovely!”

“They all are darling!” Alison assured him, patting his arm.

Sarah stayed on the ship for three more days, and Steve was desperately sorry to see her go. He liked Jacquie and Charles, but Sarah was a special friend, and they were both in tears at her departure.

“I’ll come back soon!” she assured him, as she left towards the shuttle bays.

“You’d better!” he told her. “I want you to be the third person to hold my baby!”

“Oh, and who’s the first?”

He smiled as he hugged her. “Me! And Karen can be the second if she wants!”

Sarah looked a little anxious. She knew that Karen was ambiguous about the baby; understandable, she supposed, as it wasn’t hers. Still, Karen really ought to be supporting poor Steve a bit more. Perhaps she would mention it down on the planet.

And then she was gone. Life aboard ship returned to the previous pregnancy laden ennui for Steve, lightened only by conversations with Alison about old Earth, and more significantly, with helping Charles look after Greg. Steve was obsessed with the baby, he recognized that, but he just couldn’t help himself. It was all the more hard on him two weeks later then, when Charles announced that he and Greg were going down to Planet.

“For how long?” Steve gasped.

Charles smiled. “Well, forever I should think. It’s where we live now Steve.”

Steve looked down at Greg in Charles’ arms. “Are you sure you wouldn’t prefer to leave Greg here? He might be a bit young to be exposed to all that stuff.”

“He’ll be fine,” Charles assured him. “Anyway, you’ll see him again soon enough when you come down with your baby.”

Steve nodded ruefully. That moment seemed as far away as ever, another 50 days or so. Without the joy of Greg to look forward to, the days would drag even longer. He kissed Charles goodbye, and with tears in his eyes, went back to his room. Jacquie was less company than ever as their last few weeks approached. She spent most of the time asleep in her room, and was languid and listless when she did appear. Steve tried not to blame her for this, but it was difficult. He was pressed more and more into the company of Alison. He felt a little uncomfortable around the older woman, and didn’t like the way she kept staring at him, as if he was some sort of freak. She probably couldn’t get used to the idea of a boy being pregnant, he supposed, that was why she kept staring.

He wished Karen would take a few days up on the ship with him. He even suggested it to her when she called him on his Interface one night. She sort of evaded the question, and said she’d have to see when she could get a break in her work schedule. That made him cross with her, and he lay on his bed petulantly wishing she could spend a day or two like this, a beached whale, just so she would know what he was going through. Feeling righteously sorry for himself, he dozed off to sleep.

He was startled to wake and find his hair being stroked. He jumped, and looked to see who it was; Alison. “Oh I’m sorry,” she said. “I didn’t mean to startle you!”

“I didn’t hear you knock,” he muttered, blinking a few times to bring himself to consciousness.

“I didn’t,” Alison confessed. “The Machine’s given me right of access to yours and Jacquie’s rooms; just in case.” She waited while he absorbed this information. “It’ll soon be over, don’t you worry.”

He smiled at her, and let her continue to stroke his hair. “I get scared sometimes,” he confessed.

“Of course you do,” she soothed. “It’s only natural. Every mother since the beginning of time has been scared, especially when it’s her first.”

He smiled again. “And I’m sorry I didn’t get my bits put right. It seems silly now, but it was important at the time.”

“It’s all right.”

“It won’t hurt the baby will it, me still having a ‘thing’?”

She laughed. “Of course not. The only real problem is you not having a vagina. It would have been better if you’d have got yourself one of those first.”

“I know,” he said ruefully. “I won’t be able to give birth properly will I? Not like Charles did.”

“Well not the same,” she said kindly. “But lots of women have to have their babies like you’re going to. It’s just as proper. It’s better in some ways, because we can decide the right time and things like that.”

Steve sighed again. “But I’m not sure that I’ll feel like a proper mother,” he complained.

“Oh you little darling!” Alison gasped, “How can you of all people say a thing like that? You’re the best little mother I’ve ever seen, it’s part of what makes you special!”

Steve was surprised to see tears in her eyes. “You said that before,” he pointed out. “That I’m special. What do you mean by that?”

She suddenly stopped stroking his hair, and looked away. “Oh it’s just something to say,” she muttered unconvincingly.

Steve pulled his torso up onto his pillow. “No it’s not,” he said quietly. “It’s something else. You said the Machine told you I was special the first time. What does it mean?”

“I don’t know,” she said, standing up, and walking towards the door. “I expect it just meant that you were once a boy or something like that.”

“No it didn’t!” Steve insisted. “Tell me!”

She stopped. “I really ought to go and check on Jacquie as well.”

“Not until you’ve told me what being special means!”

She sighed, and turned to face him. “I don’t really know,” she said. “The Others mentioned it when we left old Earth, but I can’t remember the details.”

“What did they mention? Me?” he demanded, sitting himself up, and preparing to stand.

“Oh God Steve, I don’t really know!” she insisted. “I was only young remember. It’s just that, well, they thought some of us.” She stopped and looked at him. “Some of us would have special gifts when we got to a planet.”

Steve looked at her and frowned. “Special gifts?”

“Yes, I didn’t understand it at all. All I know is that you’re one of the special ones. You and Eddie.”

“Eddie!” spluttered Steve.

Alison nodded ruefully. “That’s why it was important that you had his baby. You and he are special, but your baby’s going to be even more special.”

Steve heaved himself to his feet, and dragged himself upright. “But you still haven’t told me what special means!”

“I really don’t know Steve,” she went on. “It’s something to do with setting up the colony, that’s all I know. The Others on Earth seemed to think it was really important when they were getting us ready for the journey”

He looked at her. Was she really as ignorant of all this as she said she was? She had already told him that the original crew had been brought up much as his generation had been, isolated from the rest of the human race, except in their case in a special facility on a military compound, rather than on a ship floating through the depths of space. “So what is this special gift?”

“I really don’t know. Eddie’s is something to do with the animals. I can see that from what Sarah was saying about him, but yours, well I just don’t know.”

“And what about my baby?” Steve demanded, concerned that being special might harm her in some way.

“She’ll be even more special because she’ll be able to do everything you can do, and everything Eddie can do as well.”

The baby kicked once more, and Steve had to sit himself back down on the bed. He shut his eyes for a moment. “Well if you don’t know, I’d better ask the Machine myself,” he said, quietly. Alison looked at him with genuine concern.

“Don’t let it upset you Steve,” she warned him. “You’ve got another important job to do, there inside your tummy.”

“Oh I know that,” he said, fixing her with his dark eyes. “I know that Alison, only too well.”

“But it’s more important than you know. She’ll be the first one to be extra special.”

Steve’s eyes became darker and harder. “I don’t need you or that bloody Machine to tell me my baby’s going to be extra special!” he spat. “I’m going to have it out with the damn thing now!” With some difficulty, he got himself back to his feet.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to the Interview room,” he announced, as the baby kicked him once more.

“There’s no need for that,” she told him. “I can get the Machine to talk to you here if you want.”

He hesitated. The idea of dragging himself along the corridors while his baby was being so lively didn’t desperately appeal, but he found himself trusting Alison less and less. Why did she know how to get the Machine to talk to him in his room? He had never heard of that before. Surely someone would have done it before, if it were possible. Stuart would, for a certainty. However, after a further kick from the baby, he nodded his assent, and Alison bustled over to his Interface and tapped furiously on the keyboard. There was a clunk and whistle from the speaker that used to announce mealtimes, and then the familiar metallic voice of the Machine.

“We have enabled direct communication in this room as requested A8.”

“Thanks,” she muttered. “G11 is here.”

“We have detected this. Communication may proceed.”

Alison looked over to Steve, and nodded. He coughed to clear his throat. “Why am I special?” he demanded. Five seconds of silence followed.

“We do not know. Some humans are special, others are not. Until the breeding programme commences and is managed, the incidence of specialness is not predictable. Even then we are only able to assess the probability of its occurrence in any one individual. You simply are special because you are. The probability was one in twenty in your generation.”

Steve gritted his teeth. “No,” he shouted. “I mean in what way am I special?”

The Machine was silent once more, and Steve began to wonder whether it would withhold the information entirely. Then it spoke again. “You have an ability others on the ship do not possess. It is an ability required for successful colonisation.”

That made no sense, Steve thought to himself. The Machine could have said the same about Stuart, and his electronic abilities, or Sarah with her knowledge of living systems. “What is this ability?” he asked.

The Machine was silent for twenty seconds. “We are unable to trace any direct linguistic match,” the Machine announced at last.

“Then give me an indirect one!” Steve demanded.

“That could be misleading, and or unhelpful.” the Machine observed.

“I don’t care. I want to know!”

The Machine was silent for ten seconds before continuing. “Very well,” it announced. “You are special because you are the mother.”

Steve’s face grimaced in frustration. “I’m not a mother yet for God’s sake, anyone can see that! And it’s hardly unique anyway.”

“Agreed,” the Machine boomed in response. “You are not yet a mother. But you are the mother.”

Steve’s mouth opened. The mother. What did a phrase like that mean? “And my baby?” he whispered, concerned for its welfare in all of this.

“Your baby is the daughter of the mother, and” it hesitated. “Seeking near match.” It paused again.” And the daughter of the hunt.”

“The hunt?”

The Machine rattled before replying. “Data verified. B8 is the hunt.”

Steve’s face looked startled, and he gazed over at Alison, nervously standing by the door. She came over to him, and put her hand on his shoulder. “I told you it was difficult to understand. I don’t know what it means either, only that it’s important.”

Steve felt himself shaking, and he placed his hand on his stomach to reassure his baby that all was well, although somehow he felt it wasn’t.

“You have been confused by the lack of a direct linguistic parallel,” the Machine observed unhelpfully. “We will seek others, but the process may be slow as you comprehend no other languages.”

“We read some stuff in French a couple of years ago!” Steve protested.

“No non-human languages,” the Machine corrected itself.

“So what does being the mother involve?” he asked, less assertively now, and genuinely afraid to hear the answer. The Machine took a considerable time to formulate a reply.

 “Being the mother enables successful colonisation to take place,” it said at last.

“But what do I do?” he wailed.

Again the Machine was silent for several seconds. Alison sat down next to him on the bed, and put her arms around his shoulders. “You must talk to the rocks,” it announced at last, as if this was a useful revelation.

“That means nothing,” he grunted.

The Machine chuntered to itself for ten seconds. “You were warned that the use of indirect linguistic parallels could be misleading,” it pointed out. “You must talk to the rocks if the colony is to succeed.”

“Well how can I talk to the rocks while I’m up here?” Steve demanded. “You should have let me go down to the surface when I wasn’t so pregnant if it was that important.”

“The successful carrying to term of the daughter of the mother and the hunt was of equal importance, and greater urgency,” the Machine told him blankly. “You will be able to talk to the rocks on the planet’s surface after your baby has been delivered.”

He sat silent for several minutes, as Alison fussed around him. “You’re tired,” she said at last. “Shall I get the Machine to shut up now?”

He looked at her with wild startled eyes, as if not understanding her. He looked so vulnerable, she thought, brushing his long dark hair away from his face; so vulnerable and troubled, and yet, she knew, hardly even at the beginning of his difficult journey. If only she could help him, but of course, she couldn’t. No one could. Steve was the mother, and would have to shoulder the burden alone.

Chapter Three

The Machine’s comments about him subtly changed his relationship with Alison. Before, he had regarded her as the font of all wisdom, particularly on subjects to do with childbirth and old Earth. She still knew things he didn’t, he realized that, but she treated him with such awe and respect as to make him avoid her if he could.

Karen still resisted his urgings to come up to the ship for a couple of days. He needed company badly, and didn’t find Jacquie a particularly adequate substitute. He took to spending more and more time alone in his room, dozing often, and thinking about names for his daughter to be. He thought he knew why Karen was staying away; he was hardly inspiring company himself, and certainly not attractive in any sexual way. But he did miss her.

Jacquie did manage one surprise for him, however, around three weeks after the Machine had told him about his ‘specialness’. She came into his room, and sat herself down on the bed, looking miserable, and as large as him. He got her a drink from the Interface, before settling himself down next to her.

“Are you all right?” he asked. She looked woefully down at the floor, and shook her head.

“No,” she declared. “I’ve been stupid.”

Steve sighed. He felt sure he was in for some sort of melodrama from her. “What have you done?”

“It’s about the baby,” she muttered. He was immediately alarmed. Had she managed to harm it in some way? Now that really would be something to get angry about. He shook his head to indicate he didn’t understand.

“It’s not Malcolm’s,” she wailed. “I made that up.”

She had told him, everyone in fact, that Malcolm was the inadvertent father of the child; that she, like him, had been unwittingly impregnated by the Machine. “What do you mean?” he asked, as calmly as he could.

“He’s not the father. He couldn’t be. He only has sex with Eddie, everyone knows that.”

“But the Machine?”

“Oh that was the stupid part. When I realized I was pregnant, I thought it would be good to say it had happened the same way as you,” she went on. “Nobody was blaming you; they all felt sorry for you, so it seemed a good idea at the time!”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

She sighed heavily. “Oh God Steve, you know what its like. All the girls think I’m a slut, that I’d sleep with anyone and everyone. All the girls think that, I know they do, even you!”

“I don’t think you’re a slut,” he assured her.

“You do!” she said accusingly. “You used to think those pictures I had on my bedroom wall were obscene! I saw you looking at them with your little nose all screwed up!” Steve ran through his memory. Jacquie’s bedroom did used to be covered in naked and semi naked pictures of men, it was true. But he didn’t remember being particularly disapproving of them. It was up to her what she put on her wall.

“I thought they were quite nice,” he lied.

“No you didn’t.”

“I did!” he went on. “I thought about getting some for myself, but I reckoned Karen would get jealous.”

She lifted her eyes for a moment and half grinned before returning to her sorrowful pose. “Well anyway,” she went on. “Most of the girls think I’m a slut, except maybe you and Gloria.”

“Well it doesn’t really matter what they think,” Steve told her.

“It does!” Jacquie wailed. “Especially when we’re stuck living with each other for the rest of our lives! That’s why I made up the story about the Machine getting me pregnant. I wanted to be more like you. Everyone loves you! They love you and hate me.”

“That’s not true,” he mumbled.

“It is,” she went on bitterly. “The boys all think you’re gorgeous, and the girls, well, they all look up to you.”

“I don’t think that’s true,” Steve responded. They were silent for a moment. “So it wasn’t the Machine that got you pregnant then?” he offered tentatively.

“No of course not. Why should it? Not when I was doing so well by myself.”

Steve bit his lip, and put his hand on her shoulder. “Well you’re entitled to a sex life; we all are. I mean, you were fifteen weren’t you?”

She nodded, and laughed bitterly. “Yes, but I needn’t have been so enthusiastic about it. That’s where the problem lies!”

Steve sighed again. “Well we all like sex, Jacquie. You’re no different from the rest of us.”

“I am!” she shouted. “Oh God, I’ve been so stupid!”

She began crying, and Steve comforted her for a while. “Well who is the father then?” he asked, thinking of poor Malcolm down on the planet assuming the baby was his. She dried her eyes, and looked at him sorrowfully.

“Well to be honest, I don’t really know. I think it’s probably Bryn’s, but I’m not sure.”

“Oh Jacquie!” he gasped, hugging her while thinking of the effect this news might have on Janet, now Bryn’s girlfriend.  Jacquie was crying again.

“But he hates me now he’s got that bloody Janet. And anyway, I suppose it could be Roger’s. I just don’t know. I was in a bit of a mess at that time.”

“Oh poor you!” Steve told her. “Well the Machine could find out for you. Why don’t you ask it?”

“I don’t want to,” she said, pouting. “What’s the point? If it is Bryn’s and people get to know, then everyone will hate me for ever, Janet will make sure of that.”

“I’m not sure that’s true,” Steve told her, although he could see the likelihood of her surmise. Janet was popular; Jacquie was not.

“It is,” she insisted. “

Steve sighed. “Well it’s not very fair on Malcolm though is it?”

She looked at him haughtily. “He’s all right about it. He wanted to marry me!”

“Because he thought the baby was his!” Steve pointed out. “God Jacquie, this is a bit of a mess!”

“I know!” she wailed. “You won’t tell anybody will you? I know I can trust you Steve. You’re a real true friend.”

He bit his lip, and thought about this. “Well it could be a problem in the future.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well like the baby will need to know who its father is, won’t it?”

Jacquie shook her head. “I don’t see why.”

Steve sighed. “Well we have to be careful that nobody ends up having their brother’s baby and things like that.”

Jacquie thought about this. They had covered the dangers of genetic inbreeding in some depth in their studies a few years back. “Well I’ll make sure of that,” she said firmly.

“But what if your baby ends up loving another one of Bryn’s? You’ll have to say something then.”

“Well we can cross that bridge when we come to it.” Jacquie stated with some finality. “I don’t want anyone to know. Not now. If I could go through it all again, I think I’d tell the truth. I just wanted to be more like you, so people would like me. But now I’m stuck with this stupid story about it being Malcolm’s!”

She cried some more, and Steve hugged her. She pushed him away after a while, and dried her eyes. “I’m sorry,” she muttered. “Sorry to burden you with this, but I had to tell someone. And you’re so special.” The choice of words made him jolt. What did she mean by that? He calmed himself enough to reply however.

“That’s all right.” he assured her with a smile. “And don’t worry. I won’t say anything.”

She smiled at him, and kissed him on the cheek. “Thanks Steve! You’re a real friend. Anyway, haven’t you got something to tell me as well?” He frowned and shook his head.

She smiled knowingly. “Come on Steve! You know what I mean!”

“No I don’t.”

She poked him playfully in the ribs. “Now don’t give me that. We’re both women of the world now. I know being examined by the Machine doesn’t get you pregnant! You can’t fool me! So who was it? Who is the father?” Steve was completely shocked, and his mouth fell open. “Don’t worry,” Jacquie went on. “I won’t tell anyone either. Who was it? Karen?”

“No!” Steve protested.

“I bet it was!” Jacquie said, moving towards him as he backed away from her. “I just bet it was!”

Steve stood up, and turned his back on her. God, it was so difficult to be dignified in his present condition, but he did his best. “No it wasn’t!” he insisted. “It really was the Machine that got me in this condition. As it happens,” he said, spinning around, and fixing her with his dark eyes. “I couldn’t get pregnant any other way. That’s why I’m having my baby by Caesarean if you remember!”

Jacquie’s face fell this time as the savagery of Steve’s words hit her. He glared at her, and then screwed up his face, as his baby playfully kicked him. “I’m sorry Steve,” she whispered mournfully. “I forgot.” He didn’t respond. “I really am sorry Steve. It was so thoughtless of me! You must be so cross with me for being able to have boys properly! What do you do for them instead? They all seem to like you so much! And God, you must be so scared of Karen getting bored waiting for you to have yourself put right as well! I am sorry Steve!”

Steve felt the anger welling up inside him, and pressed his lips closely together. The baby moved once more, and he waited until she stopped before breathing again. How dare she suggest that he wanted to have sex with boys? He had never wanted that. He had never wanted, well, hardly ever wanted, not until recently anyway, Karen to take him like that! How could Jacquie suggest such a thing!

“I think you’d better go,” he said breathlessly at last.

“Oh God, you’re cross with me!” Jacquie wailed.

He shrugged. “A bit. I’ll get over it. But I need a rest for a minute; you know what it’s like.”

Jacquie pulled herself up off his bed, and came over to him, placing a hand on his arm. “Sorry Steve,” she said again.

“Go!” he shouted, and she jumped back. The baby in his stomach protested again about him shouting, and he placed his hand on his bump to calm it.

“All right,” Jacquie said quietly. “Shall I see you later?”

“Of course. It’s a small ship,” he said through gritted teeth, as the baby kicked once more. He heard the door open and close again, and sat himself down on the bed.

He felt sorry for himself. Why did this all have to happen to him? He had been quite happy as a boy, and would have been content to live his life out as one. Then, just because the Machine had had some daft notion that his spirit was female, or mainly female, he now found himself heavily pregnant, and with Jacquie pitying him for not being able to have sex with other boys! The baby kicked him once more. He shushed her, and stroked his bump again. Then there was this nonsense about him being the mother. He hadn’t even asked to be a mother, let alone the mother.  He sighed out loud. Life was very unfair, he told his unborn child.

He wished Karen were there to lean on! She would wrap her arm around his shoulders and everything would be fine. The other boys had it so easy compared to him, and he told himself that he should have stayed one. The baby kicked him once more, and he told her that he loved her. He needed to wee again, and reluctantly got up off the bed to do so.

Falling out with Jacquie made life even more boring on the ship. The only conversations he had, except through his Interface, were with Alison, who treated him like visiting royalty whenever he appeared. The only thing that made the experience tolerable, oddly enough, was his increasing tiredness. He seemed to fall asleep every time he sat down, and if it wasn’t for the weakness of his bladder, he would probably have slept virtually all day every day.

He even embarrassed himself when Jeanette came to visit him. He was delighted to see her of course, and begged her for surface news. He lay down on the bed to listen, as she told him of some of Stuart’s foibles, laughing and giggling from time to time, but fell asleep before she had finished. He woke up later, desperate for the toilet, and found himself alone in the room. He found her in the Refectory once he had relieved herself, and apologized profusely. She told him not to be so silly, and how much he needed his rest, but he still felt ashamed of himself.

His nagging of Karen eventually paid dividends as well. She paid him an all too brief visit. He tried to get himself presentable for her arrival, but it was so difficult to maintain his enthusiasm for the task. He made up his face well enough, but spent too long trying to work out what she would like him to wear, and ended up having to put on a shapeless black dress in a rush with no tights or anything. He waddled his way towards the shuttle bays, and waited for her.

He leaned against the wall, and shut his eyes while he waited, stroking his bump, and talking to the little thing inside. He had never seen her, but he loved her so much, he told her. He remembered the smell and the feel of little Greg in his arms and smiled. Soon enough he would be able to hold his own baby that way.

Then Karen was there. He looked at her open mouthed, as she came along the corridor towards him. She was so big, wearing the typical planetside work uniform. His eyes widened as she approached. She was going to hug him, and looking at her broad shoulders as her arms opened up for him, he was afraid she would break him, or more importantly, hurt the baby.

But she didn’t of course. Her embrace engulfed him entirely, but was so gentle. He sunk his head into her chest, and gave a little sob of joy, as his hands, feeling so tiny and inadequate, reached for her face. He looked up into her eyes, and although misted with tears, was able to see genuine pleasure on her face. She was pleased to see him! She bent down and kissed his forehead, smiling at him. Her eyes then moved to his bump, and he felt embarrassed.

“Looks like someone’s coming between us,” she said gently, and he laughed. He stood on his tiptoes to kiss her, reaching her chin, and she laughed again, stroking his hair. They went off to their former trysting ground in the Viewing Point and simply sat next to each other, enjoying each other’s nearness.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t get up here before,” Karen told him.

He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter,” he lied, stroking her shoulders and her chest. She was so big and strong and dependable, and he loved her for it. “You’re here now.” Then a thought came over him, and he pulled at the zipper up by her neck.

“What are you doing?” she asked him, but not resisting.

“You don’t have to wear that here, you’ll get too hot” he teased, as he pulled the zipper down towards her crotch. He held her with his eyes, and in spite of his bump, kissed her on the lips, before slipping his hand inside the overall.

“You don’t have to do that,” she hissed, obviously, in spite of her statement, aroused by the prospect and the memory of his previous ministrations.

“I want to!” he told her, kissing her once more.

“Are you sure it’s safe?” she asked, as her head fell back in anticipation.

He giggled, and tilted his head to one side. “Well I don’t think I need worry about getting pregnant, do you?” Karen laughed, and he kissed her, before busying himself once more. He slipped his hand into her briefs, feeling the coarse hair inside, and moved it downwards to find his target. And there it was, her hugely enlarged organ, now rapidly becoming engorged with blood.

“My God Karen!” he gasped, as his hand clasped around it. “You’re getting even bigger!”

“I know!” she grunted, as he began to massage.

He smiled at the half pained, half intoxicated expression appearing on her face. “Are you sure you haven’t had this corrected without telling me? Mine was never as big as this!”

She grunted, as her body shivered in response to his touch. “No!” she managed to say at last, as her breathing rasped between her teeth. He smiled once more, and began to move more rapidly.

Then she shouted, and he body jerked back on forth on the seat, her hands grabbing onto him so hard that they hurt. But he didn’t mind. He had achieved his goal. He’s show Jacquie that he could keep Karen satisfied, even without her natural gifts! He slowed his motions, and allowed Karen to relax back into the chair.

“That was a bit quick,” he teased her, stroking her face.

“Ugh, I know,” she managed to say. “Sorry. It’s been a while.”

He smiled and kissed her again. “I don’t mind, as long as you enjoyed it.”

“Oh God I did!” she said, and jerked once more. He kissed her.

“So did I,” he whispered into her ear.

Karen only stayed two days, but Steve tried to make the most of it. She tried to touch him once or twice, but he pushed her hands away, happy simply to give her pleasure. He wanted her touch, he wanted it so much, but he didn’t want to disturb the baby. They spent much of the time lying in each other’s arms, and Steve dozed soundly for the first time in weeks, knowing she was there, taking care of him. Then she had to go, and he was bereft and alone once more.

Time seemed to go so slowly for Steve just then. He had only one thing to look forward to, but as the days dragged by, it seemed to get no nearer. Then, one day as he was being examined by the Machine with Alison in attendance, he was suddenly given a date! He was to have his baby in twenty days time! The news made his impending motherhood all the more real, and he quickly went back to his room to discuss the matter with Sky. He had named his daughter Sky. He didn’t know why and he had told no one else, but there was no doubt in his mind that was her name.

He lay on his bed, telling her how much he longed to see her and what she should expect when she was born. How he would care for her, feed her and clothe her, and make sure she was the best-loved baby in the entire Universe. She kicked him in response, but he didn’t blame her. It was her way of saying hello, however much it hurt. His boobs felt huge and hot, and in some positions almost blocked his view of Sky and the bump where she lived. He was cross with them for a moment, until Sky reminded him, by kicking him, that she was looking forward to seeing them as well! Breastfeeding; he was torn about it. Alison kept going on, and on, and on, about how he would have to do it, and how good it would be for him and Sky. He wanted to do the best for her, of course he did, but he was scared as well. What if he couldn’t do it properly? What if it hurt? Alison instructed him in all sorts of ways to make sure it went well, but he was still worried. Most of all, he didn’t want to let Sky down.

He bumped into Jacquie once or twice, but they didn’t talk much. Apart from their disagreement, both of them were so tired. Five days had passed since he had been given his date by the Machine, when he felt hungry in the middle of the day, and decided to waddle off to the Refectory to get himself something to eat. He could have ordered something through his Interface, but he was bored with the sight of his own room and felt a bit like a prisoner. Going to the Refectory was a big adventure now, his temporary escape from the four walls of his own room.

As he waddled gracelessly through the door, he didn’t at first see the figure in the corner eating. He went over to one of the delivery chutes and pondered what he might have.

“Steve!” he heard, and nearly jumped out of his skin. Sky disapproved too of this sudden movement and told him so. He turned to see a figure rising from its seat. It was Malcolm.

Steve’s hand was on his chest, calming his thumping heart. “Malcolm,” he managed to say once the initial shock had passed. “I didn’t know you were on the ship.”

Sarah’s erstwhile dream man had a wide grin on his face, and he quickly skipped between the empty tables towards Steve and kissed him. Steve blinked in astonishment. Malcolm had never been affectionate to him before. Hardly surprising, given that Steve had bullied him mercilessly when he had been a boy.

“Well aren’t you going to congratulate me?” Malcolm asked, still beaming madly.

“Congratulate you?”

“Yes! I’m a father!” he said, clapping his hands together. “Last night, a daughter! We’re calling her Arwen!”

“Arwen,” Steve gasped. “That’s lovely!” He wondered what Bryn would think of that as a name for his daughter, as Malcolm hugged him once more.

“She is lovely!” he gushed on. “Just like her mother.”

“I’m sure,” Steve said, and managed to smile. He wobbled uncertainly on his legs. “Sorry Malcolm, I’ve got to sit down.”

“Of course!” he said, pulling a chair out for Steve. “I’m sorry. I’m just a bit excited.”

“You’ve every right to be,” said Steve, patting his hand and sitting himself down heavily. Something stirred in his chest. There was a baby on board again, like Greg; something he could hold and cuddle. He blinked a couple of times to clear his head, and smiled warmly at the poor deceived Malcolm.

“Eddie was really pleased too!” Malcolm went on. “I know we’re,” he hesitated. “Well, perhaps we’re not the fathers you and Jacquie would have chosen. But we’re both determined to help you both all we can!”

“I know,” Steve assured him. He began to worry whether he really would be able to share the care of Sky with Eddie, not because he didn’t like the boy; not because he was gay; but because Steve wanted to do all the caring himself. He was the mother after all, and mothers were special.

“And is Jacquie all right?” he asked the still grinning Malcolm.

“Oh yes, fine. A bit tired, but that’s only to be expected.”

“Yes,” Steve agreed. “Well, I just came here for something to eat. Once I’ve done that I’ll go along and see the two of them if that’s all right.”

“Yeah,” Malcolm agreed readily. “Alison said I should go off and get some sleep. But I was too excited to be honest.” He yawned.

“Well she might be right,” Steve told him. “Arwen and Jacquie will be fine for a few hours. You should do what Alison suggested.”

Malcolm frowned, and then nodded. “Let me get you some food first. What do you fancy?”

Steve sighed. Eating was nothing but a chore these days, everything tasted funny. “I’ll have some muesli with yoghurt,” he said at last. Malcolm nodded eagerly, and went to get a bowl. He then brought his own half finished meal over to Steve’s table, and ate it greedily while Steve picked unenthusiastically at his. Steve eventually managed to persuade Malcolm to go off and get some sleep, and pushing his bowl only half finished to one side, prepared himself for his trip to the Medical Centre. It wasn’t going to be easy, seeing Jacquie once more, but he had to do it, and he had to see Arwen and check that she was happy and beautiful.

He quickly told Sky what they were going to do, and promised not to get upset or shout. Sky seemed either happy with the news or asleep, and he pulled himself upright and waddled off to the Medical Centre. It took him some time, and he stopped to rest on the way on a seat in a little alcove, upsetting himself even more by dozing off for a while in it. It was his bladder that woke him, and he had to empty this before renewing his journey.

At last he reached the familiar door. It brought back memories of little Greg, and he smiled to himself, before sighing and placing his hand on the panel at the side. The door slid open and he went on through. It took a few seconds before his eyes adjusted to the subdued lighting, but once they had, they moved directly to the crib.

“Shh, they’re sleeping!” he heard a whisper. It was Alison, slumped in the chair beside the bed. He nodded his understanding, and padded closer to the baby. Shaking a little, he looked inside the crib at the tiny figure, wrapped up so that only its face showed, with eyes firmly closed and her little mouth pouting. He smiled. She was beautiful, and his heart ached.

Alison stood up. “Actually,” she whispered once more. “I’m a bit tired myself. It was a long one, I can tell you that!”

Steve looked at her briefly. “And everything went okay?”

The older woman nodded, and then yawned and stretched. “Yes. It was fine. A bit long, like I say, but it’s often like that with their first ones. Charles was quite lucky.”

Steve’s attention had returned to the crib, and almost without thinking he reached in and tidied the blankets. There was the tiniest of stirrings from the baby. “Do you want to go and get some sleep yourself?” he asked Alison without changing his gaze. “I can keep an eye on things here.”

Alison hesitated only briefly before agreeing, and picking up one or two things, thanked him and left. He sat down next to the baby and gazed in on her. “Look at her!” he told Sky. “She’s beautiful isn’t she, not as beautiful as you’ll be of course, but she’s still beautiful.”

He smiled, and after only a short time gave in to his desires, and reached in to take the baby, holding it in his arms above his bump, and swaying her back and forth. “Hello little Arwen,” he whispered, and kissed her bumpy little forehead. He relaxed back into the chair, and fell asleep once more.

He was woken by a baby stirring. He wasn’t sure whether it was Arwen or Sky. Opening his eyes, he looked down at the bundle in his arms, and saw two little open eyes glaring angrily at the ceiling. His bump shifted as well in response, and he heard himself give a little moan. He smiled at little Arwen and kissed her once more. Jacquie stirred, and he guiltily took the baby away from his face. She would be awake soon he knew, and the magic of this moment would be gone.

“Jacquie,” he whispered. She stirred again and lifted her head to look at him. “Congratulations,” he whispered again. “She’s lovely.”

Jacquie moaned quietly, and shut her eyes once more. “She wasn’t so lovely coming out,” she muttered. “She nearly tore me in two.”

“But she’s worth it,” Steve said brightly.

“Is she?” Jacquie moaned. Steve frowned and subconsciously held the baby closer. Her tiny arms flayed against his heavy breasts, and she gave a little mew.

“Have you fed her yet?” he asked.

“No, and I don’t want to. The Machine can do it,” Jacquie muttered, her eyes still closed in search of sleep. Arwen mewed again, and he joggled her up and down.

“It’d be better if you did it yourself,” he said at last. “It’s better for them, and for you.”

“You bloody do it then if you think its such a good idea.”

Steve bit his lip. He would if he could, he knew, and soon he would be able to for Sky. Not yet though, he remembered. “Come on Jacquie, you hold her. My arms are getting tired.”

Jacquie tossed and turned a few times. “Just put her in the crib. I’ll see to her in a minute. I’m tired.”

“Jacquie!” he said, in a less gentle voice. “She needs you!”

With exaggerated difficulty, Jacquie pulled herself up, and leaned back against her pillows. “All bloody right,” she said. “Satisfied?” She held out her arms for the baby, which Steve gently handed over to her. She took her, and cradled the tiny thing in her arms. “I’m going to do the same to you,” she said to Steve, while still looking at Arwen. “When you’re feeling ripped apart and like you haven’t slept in a week, I’m going to tell you to feed your baby!”

Steve looked at her, worried for a moment, and then laughed. “And I’ll probably be as grumpy as you when you do. But I’ll do it; I know I will.”

She stared at him for a few moments, and then laughed as well. “Sorry Steve,” she said at last. “I really am exhausted.” She looked back at the baby. “But I do love her, don’t worry about that.”

“I wasn’t,” Steve lied. He thought for a moment. “I’m sorry we haven’t been friends over the last couple of weeks. I just felt exhausted all the time.”

She undid her nightie, as Charles used to do lying on this same bed, and pulled out a breast. Steve smiled to himself. Until the day the Machine had given him a G number, he would have found that, especially from Jacquie, a profoundly erotic action. Boys were so stupid sometimes, not realizing what boobs were actually for!

“I was tired too,” Jacquie responded, shuffling both her boob and her baby to try and get the two to talk. “And I thought you weren’t talking to me, after…..” She glanced at Steve, rather than continue, before trying to meld baby and boob once more.

“Well I was a bit cross when you said I wasn’t woman enough for Karen,” he admitted, “But that’s all over now.”

“You and Karen are finished?”

“No!” he said, and smiled at her mistake. “I mean I realize you were just being concerned about me.”

“Oh my goodness!” Jacquie suddenly exclaimed as little Arwen’s mouth took hold. “Oh God, that feels weird!”

“You get used to it, or so Charles said,” Steve assured her.

“I bloody well hope so!”

They both laughed again, while Steve watched with rapt attention Arwen’s first attempts at feeding. Although silent, Steve felt as close to Jacquie as he ever had. How could she want to be like him when she had such a lovely thing to hold and cuddle and feed? He wanted to hold Sky there and then, and would have happily gone into spontaneous labour if he could to achieve it. He was sorry when the door opened to let in Malcolm, carrying a range of chocolates and sweets for the girl he thought was the mother of his child.

“I’d better go,” he said, standing, and returning Malcolm’s eager grin.

“How is she?” he demanded.

“Hungry,” Jacquie told him. “Stay Steve, you don’t have to go,” she said. There was a pleading look in her eyes, begging him to save her from the fruits of the lies she had so foolishly sown.

“No,” he said quietly. “I’d better go. I need a rest myself with all this excitement.” He patted Jacquie’s arm, and put his hand onto the baby as it wriggled on the girl’s chest. He kissed Malcolm on the way out, and went back to his room and slept once more.

The next couple of weeks passed by without significant incident. Steve didn’t have the chance to enjoy Arwen as much as he had little Greg. There were a range of factors in this; first, he was himself more tired than he had been when Charles had had his baby. He was nearly due now, and really didn’t feel like wandering around the ship that much. Second, Malcolm was a different sort of father than Sylvia. She had simply viewed the birth of a child, particularly a son, as proof of her super masculinity. She and Sandra had only stayed on the ship for a day, then realizing that the limited audience of Steve, Jacquie and Alison was not terribly impressed by their displays, had gone back to the Planet in the hope of creating a bigger impression. Malcolm however, oblivious to the fact that the baby wasn’t his, stayed for the whole fortnight, attending meekly on Jacquie and the baby and glowing with pride whenever he was allowed to hold the little thing. Steve began to fret about how he was going to handle Eddie when Sky was born. Steve might have dreams of playing happy families once he was allowed to take his baby down to the surface, but Eddie wasn’t cast in the role of husband in those little fantasies.

Karen had returned to the ship for another overnighter, and Steve had done his best to make it worth her while. He felt profoundly unattractive, with his huge stomach, and gross and tender breasts, and although she tried to reassure him that he was still pretty, he certainly didn’t feel it. She also made a bit of a fuss about giving him some pleasure. He was unsure about this; what effect would it have on Sky? In the end, in spite of his misgivings, he let her play with him, and was surprised at the intensity of the feeling it gave him. He quickly made his way to the Medical Centre afterwards, insisting that the Machine check him and Sky once more, and was told everything was fine.

A couple of days before he was due, he had an appointment to see Alison for a final check over. He waddled his way to the Medical Centre, and flapped his hand on the panel to open the door. He stepped through, and then stood still in shock. Alison was there as he had expected, smiling at him, but with her were two men.

“Hi there Steve!” Alison beamed at him, motioning for him to come over to the couch. “This is Ged and Gordon. They’re part of the original crew like me!”

Steve felt his heart beating fast. The two men, tall and confident, stood on either side of Alison, smiling at him. “Well this must be Steve! How do you do?” One of them held out a long arm, with a bony hand at the end of it for Steve to shake. Steve backed away slightly and blinked rapidly, somehow fearing for Sky’s safety. The man’s arm dropped slowly, and disappointment showed on his face.

“It’s all a bit of a surprise for him,” Alison said quickly, moving around the couch to put her arm around Steve’s shoulders. “It’s all right darling,” she cooed. “The Machine’s decided to revive them to help with the colony. I was just bringing them up to speed with some stuff before they go down.”

“Yes,” the other man said quietly, as if not to startle a little bird. Steve found himself backing away and into the shadow of Alison’s body.

“I’ve told them all about you,” Alison went on enthusiastically. “They think it’s fantastic!”

“We certainly do!”  the first man agreed.

“I know what you mean!” the second man put in. Steve grabbed hard at Alison’s arm, almost hiding behind her, as the two men stared at him and his lump.

“And I suppose you’ll go back to normal once you’ve had the baby?” the first man asked. His face changed as he saw the confusion on Steve’s face. “I mean, turn back to being a boy that is.”

“Of course he will!” the second man replied for Steve, beaming at him. “I mean, there are sacrifices and sacrifices aren’t there? I mean, I might have let myself be convinced to get pregnant, but they would never have taken away my little man!”

Steve stared at them wide eyed. “I’m not sure the Machine will let me,” he whispered.

“What?” the first man said, with a frown descending across his face.

“I think the Machine’s got a bit above itself since our days,” Alison told them. “We can talk about that later. Come on though, you two should leave. Steve and I have got some stuff to do.”

“Yes,” the taller man acknowledged. “Of course. Well, good to meet you Steve. I hope everything goes okay.”

“Yeah,” the second man concurred. “Come on Ged, let’s leave these two to talk babies. We’ll go and get ourselves something to eat.”

Steve and Alison watched them go, before he separated himself from her protection. “Are you alright dear?” she asked him solicitously. He nodded too vigorously to be convincing. “I’m so sorry,” she went on. “I should have warned you.”

“You knew the Machine was going to revive them?” he asked, leaning on the couch for support.

“Well not exactly. I didn’t know it would be those two particularly, but I knew it was planning to revive some of my folk to help you lot out.”

Steve thought about this. Why hadn’t he known? Why hadn’t he guessed? “They were a bit loud,” he observed quietly.

“Yes, I noticed that,” Alison agreed, laughing to herself. “I’d forgotten how loud some of our boys were. Come on, shall we get you ready for the examination?”

Steve ignored her suggestion. “What did you mean by saying that the Machine had got a bit above itself?”

She was silent for a while. “Well, nothing much,” she said at last. “It’s just that in our day it didn’t seem to make so many decisions on its own.”

Steve thought about this. “What, like what genders we should be?”

“Well, yes. That and other things.”

Oh God, thought Steve; now that the grandparents were being revived, they would all think he had been stupid to let the Machine turn him into a girl! He placed his hand on his bump to reassure Sky that he was still there. They’d eventually come to the conclusion that he had let it happen deliberately, and he would be a laughing stock!

“Didn’t the Machine ever try and change anyone in your day?” he asked.

“Oh God no!” Alison gasped in shock at the thought. “Blimey, our boys were all too macho, if you know what that means! There’d have been a riot if it had tried that, I’m sure of it! But don’t worry about that now, come on, make yourself comfortable and we’ll check that everything’s fine with you and baby.”

But Steve was still thinking. “But what about your children? Didn’t the Machine ever try and say any of them were the wrong gender?”

Alison sighed. “No,” she said at last. “If anything, that would have been worse. God, I can imagine what some of the men might have said if it had suggested some of their precious sons become daughters!”

“But you weren’t here when they were classified,” Steve pointed out.

Alison sighed again. “Well I’ll tell you something. If anyone finds out that their children were changed after we went to sleep, there’ll be all hell to pay! There’ll probably rip the wires out of the Machine, and cast it into deep space! But don’t worry about it. Come on, let’s just make sure baby’s still happy.”

Steve pulled himself up onto the couch, and submitted to examination by Alison and the Machine. His mind was whirring away. It wouldn’t be too long before his own grandparents were revived. They had never known they had a grandson, but from what Alison had said, they weren’t going to be too happy that he was more or less a granddaughter now. And at some stage, his Mum and Dad would be awakened. They would demand to know why he had allowed himself to grow breasts, have his Willy shrunken down to nothing, and then be made pregnant. They would blame him! All the previous generations were super macho, as Alison had put it, he was sure of that now! And he would take the blame for letting the side down when it wasn’t really his fault! There were tears falling from his eyes, and eventually taking her eyes off the various dials and read outs, Alison noticed.

“Hey!” she said, patting his arm. “Don’t be upset! Yo