Dancing

by Janet L. Stickney
( Janetlynn17@Hotmail.com )

 

"Um… how would you like to go to our dance this year"

"Yeah. Right. Nobody gets in unless they are owners or dates or in that high class, and I'm not any of those!"

"Well, yes, but… I have a way you can go., if your willing that is."

  "If I was willing" she said. As if she could pull off the biggest coup of the decade! But when she told me exactly how she could do it, I almost fell of the floor laughing! Me? A girl? Right!

"Listen dummy, I know all about you getting into my stuff, and I've seen those pictures you created of yourself as a girl on the computer, so at the very least you must be very curious, right? And I promise, if you let me help you, I'll bet that you'll not only look gorgeous, but I can guarantee that you'll have a great time!"

"No."

"Oh yes."

"No."

"Oh… stop that! You know that you want to do it! Please! Let me help you? We can get you fixed up, and if you don't look….okay, then I won't try and force you… Okay?"

"I trust you about as far as I can throw you Janet! What's going on here? Why do you need me to dress up so bad? Tell me, or you get zip!"

  With a sigh she told me. Her date for the dance had told her that his brother had called. He was flying in just two days before the event, so rather than skip the dance, he asked her to find a date for him. I mentioned some of her girlfriends, which is when she went down the list of reasons none of them could attend. Boyfriends, they were already going, or would be out of town. A variety of reasons that all seemed very plausible.

"Believe me, I asked all of them! You can't possibly think that I would ask you if I didn't have to? Do you?"

"Well…."

"Look" she said, "I need you to do this for me! If I can arrange a date for his brother then maybe I'll have a chance with him, and I like this guy!"

"If I do this, what do I get out of it?"

"The chance to go to the most fabulous party in the city, and be one of the prettiest girls there of course!"

"Me? Pretty? I doubt that!"

"Can we at least try it? I mean, what have you got to lose? If you don't think you look good enough, I promise, I'll never mention it again… okay?"

"Promise?"

"Promise!"

  With that my sister whipped out a measuring tape and began figuring out what sizes I wore. It turned out that other being a bit taller with a slightly bigger waistline, we were almost the same size! I let her cover me with some goo that removed hair, and after a bit, I stepped into the shower to rinse it off and shave. I also used the razor to get those few hairs the remover missed, plus under my arms. I had always been enchanted with the idea of dressing up as a girl, but had never ever gone this far before. I was always too scared. This was my chance, and even though I put up a fuss, there never was any doubt in my mind that I would do it. My skin was silky smooth and after using the skin lotion, softer to the touch and less red. I stepped into the bedroom wearing a robe. My sister was waiting, a smile on her face.

  First came the panties, then a bra which was stuffed with socks, followed by pantyhose. The skirt was short, almost three inches above my knees, and pleated, while the top was a pullover crop top. Heels came next, and after that, makeup, then she worked on my hair. By the time she was done I looked nothing like that guy I really was, and only took her about an hour after I stepped out of the shower!

"This skirt is awfully short" I said, "it makes me feel naked!"

"But, you really do have great legs, so why not show them off?"

"But if I do this, I won't be wearing anything this short, so why…"

"Because you'll have to get used to dressing as a girl silly! You can't expect to get all pretty and just wear a dress do you? You'll have to practice so that you'll be able to walk, talk, and act like all of the other girls, plus, you'll need a complete make over at the salon! Fortunately we have almost four months before the dance, so you'll have plenty of time!"

"Practice? What does that mean?!"

"It means, dummy, that you need to practice being a girl! You can't seriously expect to be the perfect date on your first time out,…. Do you?"

"Well…"

"No way Jose! From now until the dance you're going to be a girl, and I plan to make you as perfect as possible! You'll love it, and I can guarantee that by the time I'm done with you nobody will ever know! So, just get comfortable, because you're now my sister…. ah…. Susan!"

  There was no stopping her once she had me dressed up, so I resigned myself to whatever happened. No matter what, I would get to see myself, in the flesh, all fixed up like a girl if nothing else! But I thought she was crazy to even try to make me into a girl, especially one that would fool any guy that was smarter than our cat, but I had tacitly agreed, which is why I was still wearing that skirt and top at dinner. Mom was a bit shocked, but when Janet explained it to her, she started to giggle, which turned into a roaring laugh. I was ready to go change right then, hurt by her laughing, but mom stopped me.

"I'm not laughing at you honey, I'm laughing because it's about time you did something about your dressing up other than just stay in your room! We both know that you've been playing dress up for a long time, so don't try to deny it, and besides, it looks like Janet has turned you into a very pretty as a girl, and I see no reason that you can't continue to let her help you be the girl we both know you've always seemed to want to be!"

  Denial was obviously out of the question, which left me no place to turn for relief. My ego has suffered a huge blow when mom did nothing to put an end to the farce of Janet making me into a girl. Given the way I looked, mom's apparent consent, Janet's obvious glee, and my own desires to look as much like a girl as possible, I was sunk. I had no way out short of a flat no, and I wasn't sure that I could even do that! After dinner I went to my room, only to have Janet barge in, a load of clothes in her arms.

"This'll be enough to get you started, but you need to have panties and bras of your own, girls don't share those, so plan on going out tomorrow morning, early, and it'll be Susan that goes shopping! No more brother until after the dance! Okay?"

"Do I have to? Go shopping as a girl I mean?"

"Yes. You have to. You need to try things on silly, and I know you don't want to do that as a guy… do you?"

"No, of course not, but…"

"No buts! In the morning you get dressed and I'll come help you with your hair and makeup!"

  So, there I was, staring into the mirror at the girl I always wanted to be, yet scared to death at the very prospect of anyone seeing me! I could see for myself that was foolish, since I looked almost as good as my sister. But I knew that clothes alone do not make a girl. It's all that other stuff. Like how they walk, and talk, hold and use their hands and arms, and a bunch of other things! I sat on the bed wondering if, one, my sister could even do it, turn me into a passable girl, or two, was she even telling the truth about this date. I trusted her, to a point, but what she wanted me to do was so far out there, and she has so many friends, that I simply couldn't believe that all of her friends could not attend! I was pretty sure that every one of them would jump at the chance to go, even to the point canceling other engagements, and that left me with the feeling that there was another motive, one she did not want to tell me. Confrontation was the only way that I would get the truth, so I went to her bedroom.

"I don't believe that cockamamie story you gave me about not being able to find even one of your girlfriends that would want to attend that bash, so I want the truth, or this charade is over, right now!"

Janet just looked at me, her mouth open, then… "I should have known that you could figure it out! I'm sorry for trying that, but I thought it would be a good way to let you finally get out of your room and experience what it's like to be a girl; get all dolled up and have a fun night out, that's all!"

"Yeah, maybe, but what about this so called date you have for me? Won't he be expecting a real girl, not a fake one? And what'll happen to me when he finds out?!"

"Well, that's why I wanted to start now, so he wouldn't find out! I thought that since we have four months, I was positive that I could turn you into a perfectly wonderful girl. I always knew that you liked to play dress up, so I was sure that you would jump at any chance to get out! I figured that by then you would be so feminine that there wouldn't be any doubt that you were a girl… !" I was uncertain I was getting the truth, but I was closer, so…

"Does this so called date of mine know… that his date is going to be your brother in a dress!?"

"Well, no, but I had to tell David; I don't know if he told his brother or not, but I doubt it, because if he did, then his brother might not go, which would mean he couldn't go either; and he needs to be there, for the business contacts he'll make."

"Do you honestly think you can turn me into a believable girl in only four months? I mean, you've had your entire life to learn how to be a girl!"

"So you'll do it?'

"Maybe, but if I do this, then I have some conditions of my own Janet. One, I want to have breast forms that are perfect, and I mean the kind that attach, and look very real. Two, they make a panty that makes boys look exactly like a girl, and I want one of those too. Three, under no circumstances can you intentionally try to embarrass me. If you do I'm out, right then, on the spot, and I mean it! And four, you have to get mom to tell me that she'll be okay with it. I mean, I can hardly learn everything I need to know unless she agrees to let me do this, especially if I have to do this full time, so until I hear it from her own lips, you get squat, okay? Oh, and I'll need to have documents that prove that I'm a girl."

"That's quite a list you have! Do you know where to get that kind of stuff? I nodded my head yes. "If it's close enough, then why don't we go there tomorrow and see what they have? Maybe that would even be better too, because then all of your bras  and panties will fit better."

"Mom first, or zip!"

"I'll get her."

  Mom told me directly that it was okay, but insisted that I take a few classes at a local beauty, or maybe charm school!

"They'll help you with your… poise? How to walk, use your arms and so on. They might even be able to teach you how to do hair and makeup. Girls your age certainly know how to do that, and I think that'll be better than having you hang around the house in a dress; you won't learn anything that way, so this is a much better option. If you do that, then I'll agree."

  So. There I was, still dolled up, trying to find a way out, but again, failing. I liked dressing up as a girl, there wasn't any doubt about that, and this would be the greatest challenge of all, but I had to learn how to be a completely passable girl in four months! As much as I hated to admit it, even to myself, a charm school would be the best way for me to learn what I needed to know. I looked at mom for any sign of deception, then at Janet, and finally, simply  said…

"Okay."

  It was done. I had just admitted to my mother that becoming a girl was the most important thing in the world for me! I went back to my room and began sorting out the things Janet had left on the bed. I put everything away, and took one more look in the mirror. There she was, the girl I had always dreamed of. From my point of view she was a real doll, but realistically, probably not. She was merely okay. I undressed, took a shower, and went to bed, knowing for sure that my future was about to change the very next day. I wondered if I could actually do it; pass myself off as a girl I mean.

  The next morning I was up early, shaved as close as possible, then got dressed. I wore skorts and a blouse. I figured that it would look like I had a skirt on, but really, I would be wearing shorts. I did not wear socks as I had on pantyhose, so I merely slipped I on my tennies and brushed out my hair, then put on some foundation and eyeliner before I added lipstick. I walked into the kitchen and started breakfast, mom arriving just as the toast popped up.

"You look very nice this morning!"

"Yeah, thanks."

"You don't have to do this you know."

"I know mom, but…."

"But you've been wondering what it's like to be a girl your whole life, right?"

"Yeah, I guess, but…"

"You're scared. I understand that, and I think that's good. You should be a little bit scared, but on the other hand, you've been playing dress up virtually your entire life, so maybe it's time that you finally did something about it!"

"If you tell me not, I'll go change right now mom!"

"Oh no you don't, I'm not going to let you make me the bad guy here! If you asked me if I like it, the answer is no. I don't like the fact that my son wants to be a girl, but you're old enough now to understand what can happen, and you're certainly old enough to make up your own mind about something like this! If you don't want to do this then don't! But if you do, then I'm going to insist that you go all out and become the girl you think you are! There isn't going to be any halfway stuff, and I'm not going to allow you to slack off even once honey. It has to be all or none!"

  My ploy to get mom to tell me to quit had failed miserably, leaving me only two options. Go, or not. If I chose go, I would have to succeed magnificently, because there was no room for failure. Failure meant that someone had figured it out, and I would be exposed and maybe ridiculed. I hate failure, and I decided that if ever there was a time to be the girl I wanted to be, then this was my best chance. I ate my breakfast, and just as I finished Janet came in, got her coffee, and sat down at the table.

"A skort! That's a good choice! I think I'll change into one too!"

  After Janet changed, she and I left. It was my first foray outside the house ever, and I was scared to death, but Janet drove so I did not have that to worry about as well. I directed her, and we soon parked in front of the shop. It was a shop that catered to guys that wanted to dress as girls, and according to their web site, could, for a price, make almost any male look like a woman. As we walked in we were assaulted by the scent of latex and perfume, surrounded by rows of wigs and clothes, as well as specialty items. I simply gaped at everything, stunned that there was so much stuff!

"Can I help you?"

"Yes" Janet said before I could say a word, "my brother here needs to look as much like a girl as it's possible to get. We have a big dance to attend, and we want to make sure…"

"It sounds like you don't want any doubt! Well, we have several items that fall in that category and can do what you want, but they are expensive, but while they are virtually perfect, they do have some limitations."

"Can we see?"

"Of course. Let me show you."

  What we saw was a DVD, showing every aspect of the panty, from getting it on to actually using it. The breasts forms also looked extremely real, and came in all sizes.

"We can fit you right now if you wish."

I conferred with Janet.

"That's what I saw on the Internet! If I'm going to do this, especially for four months, and maybe even longer, then this is the only way to go. You agree?"

"Yeah" she said, I do agree! Lets do it!"

When I told the lady… "Okay! I just knew you would! If you'll follow me, we'll get you fitted!" I started along behind her, as did Janet, but… "Oh! I'm sorry dear, but it'll be just her. You can wait out here, or maybe you can go have a coffee? It'll take about two hours, okay?"

  Janet did not like it, but she had no choice, so she left, saying that she would be back in two hours. Since the malls weren't even open yet, it really didn't matter. We would get there in plenty of time. I was told to strip, and once I was down to my panties, I was told those had to go too. So, there I was naked as the day I was born in front of a total stranger, but she was all business, and quickly set up her equipment. Using a laser, I was measured both top and bottom, then she left for a moment. Returning she had three boxes in her hand.

"Now, this one is tricky, so I'll have to help you. Spread you legs."

  With that, I was fitted with the most lifelike vaginal panty on the market. It was very tight at first, but not bad, and after a momentary bit of doubt, I quickly felt very comfortable. The breast forms were fitted as well, glued to my chest after she attached a very small pad to my nipples. Using a special seam concealer, she went over everything twice to make sure, and when she was done, it was as if I had been born a girl! I looked in the mirror, and while not shocked, I was surely stunned at the realism!

"From now on you'll have to do everything the way a girl does, and like I told you, those packets, while timed to release once a month, the first one can begin at any time, so just be aware of that and be prepared for it. It's very embarrassing for that to happen to a woman and she isn't ready. Understand?"

"Yes Ma'am."

"Those pads I put on your nipples will, like those I put on your hips and bottom, begin allow you to sense touch in the breast forms. Like if someone bumps into you, or maybe touches you?"

"Right. I'm as close to being a girl as it gets without being born one or surgery, right?"

"That is exactly right. Now, the glue lasts for about six months, so any time after that, just come in and we'll take care of it. Any other questions?"

"Well, yeah, what size do I buy. Those… for when I start…."

"Oh, just use regular, they always work, and will be comfortable enough."

  She left while I got dressed. The panties fit much better, as did the pantyhose and skorts! I had the figure of a girl! Once I was dressed I walked out and paid the bill, which made a serious dent in my money, but it was worth it just for the pleasure of knowing that I looked like a girl, if I did nothing else. With every step I could feel the differences, like having boobs that bounced in a bra while pulling on my chest, or hips that swayed and a butt that was rounder. It felt wonderful! Janet returned just as I paid the bill, and without a word she and I walked out to the car. I did not tell her anything about the special needs that panty created for me, and I did not say anything about being able to sense touch on my breasts and butt. But she knew that my shape had changed, she could see that much, and of course, she had seen everything before I had them put on.

"You look…radiant?"

"I now have a 36B-26-37 figure Janet."

"That's better than me!"

"And I'm prettier too" I said in jest.

"In your dreams maybe!"

  The first place we went to was the lingerie shop in a huge department store, where I bought panties, the high cut type, and bras in several styles, plus slips, pantyhose and camisoles. From there it was on to the junior department where I picked up shorts and slacks, plus two dresses that I liked. Then to shoes, which I needed badly. Heels and flats, tennies, and boots, even sandals. We dragged everything to the car and went back in, stopping so I could get my ears pierced and buy some costume jewelry. Makeup was on the list, so we went into one of those makeup shops where I had my makeup redone and bought everything they used on me. We stopped for lunch, then I said…

"We have to stop at a drugstore on the way home Janet, I have some personal items to pick up."

"Sure! What do you need?"

"Personal items. Stuff that only girls use."

  She didn't get it, but didn't press it either. Later, after we added a few more things, like purses and a wallet, we went home, making that one stop. Mom wasn't home when we got there, so I dragged it all into my room and started putting things away. I had put the tampons on the dresser, so when Janet came in to see how I was doing, she saw them.

"Tampons? You don't need tampons! Why would you buy something like that?"

"I don't need them right now, but maybe I will soon, and I just thought it was better to be prepared."

"Okay… what aren't you telling me?"

With a huge grin… "The panty I have on has blood packets built into it! She told me they're time released for about a month apart, and will last for six months, but she couldn't tell me when the first one would start. That's why I bought those!"

"You're telling me you are going to have periods!"

"Yup. Just like a normal girl my age would! That's what you wanted isn't it? Realism?"

"Yeah, but I never knew they could do anything like that!"

"That's what she told me so…."

"Wait a minute! If you can shove a tampon up there , then you can also have…. No!"

"Yes. She told me that because of the way they make it, most if not all of the guys out there wouldn't be able to tell the difference, so, yeah, I guess I could do it, if I wanted to, that is."

"This sucks! You have a better figure than I do, and now you're telling me that you can… Dammit…."

"Mary. My name is Mary Elizabeth, and from now on I'm your sister! But think about this. All of your parts are real, and mine are all latex and silicone gel, so who's ahead?"

"You're right sis, so what say we get upon mom a little? Lets both wear a babydoll. A satin ribbon at the neck and heels! That ought to set her back a bit!"

"I get the red!!" I said.

  And that's what happened. I wore the red babydoll with red heels and a white ribbon around my neck while Janet wore pale blue. You could almost but not quite see through those things, unless the light was behind you of course. We waited in her room for mom to get home and settle down a bit before we walked out side by side. Mom turned when she heard us, then I heard her gasp.

"Well! That's a big change!"

"She can have periods too!" Janet blurted out.

"No!" mom said, but she saw me nodding my head yes. "Isn't that a bit….more than is required?"

"You yourself told me there would be no half way, so I went all out, and I promise you that nobody can tell the difference between Janet and me!"

Mom looked at Janet, who was nodding her head in agreement. "I see. Well, I did say that, I just never figured that you would take it so literally!"

"It's also my best protection mom. Now I can prove that I'm a girl…. if I have to!"

"I suppose. You girls go put something decent on."

  Like Janet, I wore shorts and a tee, but without the bra. Mom looked at me but didn't say anything until dinner, when she said that she wanted to see the changes for herself; so after we ate, she and I went to my room and I undressed then stood in front of her naked. Mom looked me over, then touched a breast, which I felt, and jumped!

"You felt that!?"

"It's some kind of sensor that's built in."

"I see. Spread your legs honey."

  Now, that was very embarrassing, to stand like that and have my mother check out the goods so to speak. All she did was grunt once, but, as with the breast,  I could feel it every time she touched me. I didn't think that would happen, so…"

"I felt that!"

"Oh my! I do know what girls look like, and you certainly look exactly like any other girl!"

"That was the plan, remember?"

"Well, you've succeeded in convincing me! Now all you have to do is convince everyone else!"

"I'll try mom, I promise!"

"Good night Mary."

"Night mom."

  The very next day mom enrolled me in a charm school. To be blunt, I hated it. Aerobics, walking, poise, as in how to use my hands and arms, stand, sit, and even talk, were subjects that were drilled into me day after day. I was judged at every turn, weighed every day, and eventually, the lessons began to take hold. I lost 18 pounds just doing those exercises, which to be truthful, made me not only look better, but feel better. At the end of the first term, I was moved into a group, which consisted of girls who were, for the most part, trying to become models, actresses, or the like. A few were there because their mothers demanded it. By putting me into that group I was forced to act like they did, do what they did, talk like they did, and also, interact with them. It was a test of my skills, one that I simply couldn't fail. It was tough!

  Up to that point I had been allowed to change into my leotard and tights alone, but in that setting, I had to change with them. Now, that was very tough! Inside, I was your average 18 year old guy, with normal responses to girls. Outside however, I was one of those girls. For me, I was worried that being in a locker room changing clothes, surrounded by some very attractive girls, the panty would not be enough to hide my deficits. I was wrong. Not only wasn't there any standard male reaction, I had no thrill seeing so many naked girls! Looking at them was like looking at myself! My ego took a hard blow that day, but then I understood. After two months of actually being a girl in virtually every way, and along with the way the panty was built, I was one of them. I had become a girl.

  Mom and Janet had been watching my transition without much comment, until I decided to provoke them. One of the tests in school was to present ones self in a bikini, then model it for the rest of the group. Most of the girls wore average size bikinis, meaning not thongs, but a few did. For that test I had bought one that was average, red with white flowers on it; by average I mean that it was more than a thong but less than a full panty. I did not win, but came in second, none of the girls wearing a thong won by the way. When I knew that mom and Janet were home, I went to my room to change. Up to that point in my life, I had only dreamed of doing something like that; being a girl able to wear a bikini of any stripe was a myth only the desperate guys like me dream of. When I was alone, I put the bikini on, making sure to "fluff" my boobs and pull the panty snug. Then I checked my makeup and hair, making sure that I used a dark red lipstick with gloss. When I was ready, I walked out of my room. I found them on the patio.

  Janet saw me first, poked mom, and when they both looked, I strutted outside in my very best modeling walk, then posed in front of them. Neither of them said a word at first, then…

"Damn!" Janet almost yelled.

"Yes, damn" mom intoned.

  I strutted around the patio using my very best modeling walk, then posed for them, one hand on my hip, one foot in front of the other, a smile on my face.

"Damn girl! You look fantastic!"

"It seems that the charm school worked!"

"Sure did mom, just look at her!"

 I sat down next to mom, still smiling. "Well, this is what you wanted isn't it? For me to be perfect?"

"It certainly looks like you've accomplished that!" mom said with awe in her voice.

"You look thinner Mary."

"I've lost about 18 pounds so far."

"It shows" mom said, "and you do have a wonderful figure, but just how far do you intend to take this? I mean, after all this, can you even think about going back to being a boy again?"

"I don't know" I answered honestly, "but I have another four months to figure that out, don't I?"

"But the party is in only two!"

"Yes, I know, but the appliances use an adhesive that lasts a minimum of six, so no matter what, I'll be this way at least until then!"

"At least?" mom asked surprised.

"Well, what if I don't want to go back? I can't answer that right now, so I don't know!"

"You won't change back" Janet said forcefully, "not after all this! I mean, just look at you! Your better looking than a lot of girls I can name, and besides, you like it too much!"

"I agree Mary, I think you like being a girl too much to go back, but we'll wait and see I guess. Now, go put some clothes on. You've proved your point."

  I changed into a skirt and blouse then rejoined them. Mom didn't say much, but she was watching me closely' the way I sat down, walked and so on. Janet however, wanted more details about the school, and how I managed to be so feminine in such a short time. There wasn't any one thing, it was a combination of drills, desire, and repetition, which eventually corrected all of my male mannerisms. What I failed to tell them was that I had met someone. He always dropped off his sister on the way to work. Ethan was encouraging his sister Emily to go into the modeling business, which is why she was there. Emily had it all. Figure, smile, brains, and a willingness to do all the hard things it takes to be a model.

  Ethan and I were introduced by Emily, and met several times for coffee after that. According to Emily, after that first time we met, he wanted to see me more often! I demurred several times, but eventually I had to face someone other than my group or my family, so I agreed to have coffee with him. Ethan was taller than I was, even if I had on heels, with a very sturdy build, and very masculine. Everything I never was. He was attentive and funny, polite almost to a fault, and very nice looking. Watching him, I could not see any sign that he thought I was anything but a female. But then again, I used everything they taught me at school. How to smile, when to laugh, and when to act shy or coy.

  I had not said anything to mom or Janet because I didn't need the grief, but Ethan had asked me out to dinner the day before, and I had accepted, which meant that on Friday night, both would find out; rather than have it be a surprise…

"I ahhh… I have a date on Friday, so don't plan any dinner for me."

"A date! You have a date? With who? Janet sounded surprised.

"A guy I met at the school. His sister, Emily, is in my group. He's nice, and he asked me out to dinner, and I said yes, that's who!"

"Just be careful honey, you don't know a thing about handling men; you can get into trouble if you're not careful, and I don't want you to get hurt."

"I'll be careful mom. But this is something I have to do. I have to know if I'm any good outside the group!"

"I know, but men have only one thing on their minds, and you know what that is!"

"Even if I went that far, which I won't, I can hardly get pregnant!"

"That is not the point and you know it! You're only 18, even if you do look like 23, so don't get carried away! That's all I'm saying!"

"I got it mom! I got it! No fooling around on the first date, I promise!"

"First date?" Janet asked.

"Well, if we hit it off, and we have so far, he'll ask me out again, right?"

"I've created a monster!"

"No Janet, you merely let one of confinement."

  On Friday I skipped the afternoon session and went to the salon for the works. Waxing, nails, hair, and makeup, then I went home to get dressed. There was only one choice for me, the red sheath dress. It fit me like paint, was cut low enough to entice without being lewd, and was about two inches above my knees. All I had to do after  I got dressed was add jewelry and perfume. High cut lacy panties and a shelf bra to start with, then a garterbelt with nude hose. My red heels with the straps and a matching clutch bag, and I was ready. Janet saw me as I left my room and whistled, but I ignored her and went to wait for Ethan to arrive.

  When they met, I could see that both mom and Janet were sufficiently stunned with Ethan, but I only smiled, then he and I left. We talked about ourselves, mine mostly true, I just left out the part about being a guy like him. He laughed at some of my jokes, and I had a wonderful time. It was when he leaned over and kissed me, right in the restaurant that I realized just how much I wanted him to do that. Up until that point I didn't even know that, but when he did, it was like he set me on fire. He was just so manly, and I so feminine by then that I couldn't stop those feelings, and later, when he put his hand on my leg, well I knew for sure that he was more than interested in me.

  I kissed him several more times that night, but had him take me home instead of his apartment. I wasn't ready for that, but to be honest, I considered it. That night as I lay in bed I knew in my heart of hearts that There wasn't any going back, I was a girl, a woman, inside and out. Janet wanted all the details of course, but all she got was "I had a nice time." The same for mom, although I think she knew better.

  I went out with Ethan several more times, each time we both went further than before, until it happened. He wanted me in his bed, and even told me that. Up to that point it was just fondling and kissing, but going to his bed would mean  that I would no longer be able to hold onto that faint bit of doubt that crept up on me once in a while. I was, in effect, a virgin, and wasn't sure that I could do what I knew he wanted, but the girl I had become was screaming at me to do it, so… I did.

  Letting someone undress you is a complete turn on, and when I was down to my panties and a smile, I began to undress him. I could not stop myself from touching him. His chest hair, the muscles on his back, those strong legs, and his face that simply radiated sex appeal. It was when I was taking his pants down that I saw it for the first time, that which defines a man. It poked out against his boxers, an invitation for me to touch that too, and I did. I pulled his shorts down and came face to face with it. As my hand wrapped around it, the hard yet velvety feel of it was compounded by the throbbing pulsations of lust within. I looked up at him, then kissed the tip, a gentle touch that enraged his need for relief. I stroked him with my hand, smiling the whole time, but I knew that I was going to do it, so I did. I took it in one gulp and began to massage it with my tongue. He was going crazy, but when I stopped, he grabbed me up and carried me to the bedroom.

  As I lay on the bed, I watched him as he slowly lay down next to me, his hands found every single button, and I was so turned on that I pushed him over on his back, then straddled his member. Using my hand, I guided him home, then began to screw his brains out. I was watching his face as he went from merely panting to gasping as he released. I was in control, and I loved it. When he was spent, I rolled off and lay next to him, touching all over. If I had jumped off the bridge, then I was damned well going to experience all of it, and I moved so that I could restart his member. I was rewarded when he once again rose to the challenge, but that time I kept it right where I wanted it. I wanted to taste him, to feel him pulsing as he confirmed my femininity once again.

  My mother was polite enough not ask where I was all night because she already knew. Janet also knew, but could not help herself, and asked. Once again, all I told her was that I had a wonderful evening and dropped it. When I attended that dance it was anticlimactic in so many ways. My escort was handsome and polite, but we had zero chemistry. Janet's guy made his contacts and they are dating steadily now, but as for me, I now look back at how this all came to be and I'm in awe.

  I had the backing of my sister and mother, with a certain insistence that I do it right or not at all. That girl I had always harbored inside of me had been unleashed, and by working hard at it, I discovered that she was more than just a sad little boy in a dress. I found out that the woman inside was a pretty and vibrant person, quite capable of making her way in the world without doubt or fear, something I always suffered from before Mary came along. I have to go now. I'm late for my doctors appointment.           

 

         since 5/08/06